reviewerama

Supernatural, the Winchester boys

2011-07-05T20:56:00.001+10:00

If anyone told me I'd watch 'Supernatural' for character development and dysfunctional family dynamics I'd have scoffed, wouldn't you? Looks don't carry a show, but we'll make an exception for these guys Jensen Ackles and Jared Padalecki.

Dean and Sam Winchester fight Supernatural bad guys as they search for their father. Why not right, if they're in the way? These boys don't work for Fox Mulder, it's actually their family business ever since their mother was killed by a demon.

Dean Winchester waits for more pie

Dean Winchester is the older brother, and I am all for Team Dean, baby. He shifted gears from child to adult the night he ran from his burning home rescuing baby brother Sam in his arms. Left motherless and with a grieving absent father Dean was forced into a parenting and protective role over his brother for long stretches. With little life experience to draw on, Dean's thrust into adulthood was made possible by adopting his father's set of values and beliefs almost verbatim, stretching himself into a Dad-shaped Hero ideal.

As the good soldier following his father's orders and taking care of little Sam this allowed their family unit to survive but Dean's growth was stunted: a man-child ever playful, indulgent in food, alcohol and sex yet unquestioningly devoted to the demon hunting family business.

In his dutiful loyalty to his father's orders, Dean inadvertently enables their father's neglect by taking on the role of sole mother, father and older brother to Sammy. Supernatural takes us along Dean's journey as he gains insight into the boundaries of his role in the family especially towards his brother and redefines himself as distinct from the ideology his father imprinted on him.

It's a story about family conflicts with a sexy backdrop of male, female and demon eyecandy. In the pilot we learn that younger brother Sam left the family business in anger. As Sam grew up the arguments grew more and more bitter until he got out. He needed room to become the individual his experiences and personality have incubated, not the pre-prepared mould from his father and brother. If he stayed the only way they could get along would be if they treated him as an adult. Yeah right. Only when Sam and Dean must work together after the disappearance of their father that they must compromise and grow with the flow.

Sam Winchester and his perfect hair

In the academic world, Sam is your run of the mill brainy kid. Education is an attractive refuge from the dysfunction of his real life. By stepping out of his role as a Winchester foot soldier - the baby of the Winchesters, he gains the freedom to explore his own identity. Instead of vampire killer he can be a ...er... lawyer.

Physically stronger and book smarter than Dean, Sam's shortcoming vs Dean is his lack of gut instinct. Others just have to appeal to his analytical mind - leave a few misleading clues and false evidence and he would connect up all the dots in a wrong picture. In the same situation, Dean wouldn't trust the evidence. Gank first, ask later. Eventually Sam must learn to trust his intuition and the advice of others, whereas Dean learns to question orders and the judgement of those supposedly superior. Both must bridge the gap from their personal extremes in order to work as a team.

Supernatural lures its target audience with burly heroic characters, but it was the twisted brotherly love-hate relationship that hooked me for the five season back-to-back viewing. A family drama told between salt bullet shots, exorcisms and stakings. Give it a go, it's a bumpy ride but strangely addictive.

Opening Credits of Game of Thrones

2011-04-28T21:37:00.000+10:00

Spoiler-free and deserving of its own blog post. I give you....

the opening credits!

(I know, it doesn't fit properly, but I just don't have the heart to reduce it)

Why you shouldn't dismiss 'Game of Thrones' (if you're over 18)

2011-04-12T21:50:00.001+10:00

1. It's Not Really Fantasy

At first I dismissed 'North and South' because the trailer showed me just another period drama. What's the point of watching old stuffy stuff? It also had a hero that wasn't traditionally handsome. Unforgivably shallow but true.

Why the embarrassing glib confessions? Because I don't want people passing over Game of Thrones just because it's 'silly fantasy stuff'. The only reason Game of Thrones sits in the fantasy genre is because the geographical setting technically doesn't exist. It's really a human drama.

Nice suit.

Take for example Jon Snow (picture above). His dad Ned had an affair with Jon's mother and because he's such a good father he takes full custody of Jon. Enter Ned's wife Catelyn, a Jon-hater with the burning red fury of a cheated wife. Jon grows up desperate to prove himself just as good as any of Ned's legitimate sons, but with Catelyn's chilling glares he comes to realise he'll never be anything if he stays home. So he goes to the one place where all men start equal, the military. See, no elves or fairies!

Fantasy is always a hard sell because the names are so corny, like 'Wizard's First Rule' by Terry Goodkind or 'Ship of Destiny' by Robin Hobb. Silly names sound like the games children play, and no one takes that seriously. But these characters are well thought out, full of anxieties and back story. They're forced to make bad choices to avoid worse situations, and unlike in most fantasy you really care about them.

Normally I avoid fantasy. My friends have been pleading with me to read 'Chronicles of Thomas Covenant' by Donaldson but I can't get past the blurb. "...outcast destined to become the saviour of an alternate world..." Oh please. I'm so over reading about the weedy misunderstood dreamer that turns out to be the world saviour. I also can't stand the melodramatic posturing in these overly expensive tv dramas - there's no real heart. But Game of Thrones is different. Just give it a chance, a 3 episode chance?

More about Jon

Game of Thrones: Episode 1 Preview - real deal this time

2011-04-05T01:26:00.001+10:00

Big budget! I'll bet in a blind test you could be fooled to think it was the first 14 minutes of a major hollywood blockbuster. Nothing spared on special effects, horses, swords or fur capes. Just as well too. You don't want to wake the dragon, ie Game of Thrones fandom. (Scandals have broken out over the colour of someone's eyebrows)

I'm sure some eyes rolled just then, but if you're a part of any fandom you'll know how obsessive some people get. Not me of course, um, other people who start blogs and make fanvids as outlets for their obsessive admiration. : )

Here's the verdict: So far so good. To be fair, viewers should watch the first 3 episodes before they decide to keep watching or not. This show's biggest problem with winning audiences over is the attention investment at the start. With action happening in 4 cities among 5 major families this is a formidable hedge of family trees to jump over. The story is so densely packed with action they don't have a scene to waste.

Which brings me to my only peeve about this preview. Not that I'm ungrateful for the 14 minutes, but I wish it was a different 14 minutes! Could we have spent less time in the snowy forest and more time with the Stark family? Scary corpses don't need as long an intro as Rickon, Bran, Arya, Sansa, Robb, Catelyn, Ned Stark and Jon Snow. Trim the frostbitten bodies and we could have glimpsed the King and his conniving royal family.

Ned Stark: father and stickler of justice in the cold north. Too bad nobody held him accountable for cheating on his wife - surely something should get chopped off for that indiscretion?

Catelyn Stark: loving mother to her kids, and a cold bitch to Jon Snow. Only for the last 14-17 years though. Plenty of time to get over it and move on.

Bran: training on the bow, but prefers climbing.
Jon Snow: kind, strong, independent and just itching to prove himself.
The closest thing to a good guy this show has. If I was on the receiving end of Catelyn's evil eye for 14 years I'd carry more baggage than him.

Arya: cute little tomboy, good with a knife, bad with a needle.

Sansa: I'd call her a foolish child, but that'd be too kind on the stupid brat.

For a spoiler-free intro to the Game of Thrones world, go here where all these images came from.

Game of Thrones: Episode 1 Preview

2011-04-04T22:47:00.000+10:00

"I've been dealt a cruel blow by the hand of fate"

That's what I thought today as I clicked in vain on the links to this preview. Work has provided me a laptop for my travels.

No administrative rights sorry.
No Flash player installed sorry.
No Youtube allowed sorry.
Apparently my version of Windows 7 is not authentic either, it claims.
Sorry.

That's ok. I've only waited 2 years for this moment. Thankfully this hotel has a business centre. I'm saved!

What? No speakers? Haha, a trip to the mall has fixed that! Now nothing stands in the way of my ep1 fix. Nothing!

So... I can't embed it into this post because I'm on a foreign language version of internet explorer and I have no idea what the Chinese (Traditional) words for 'Embed video' are. Here's the link.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fRZJpX4AdAM

Just waiting for it to load up...brb

From Hollywood to Hollywood

2010-12-28T15:29:00.000+11:00

Someone sent me a DVD to review. Cold requests aren't really my thing but I was too curious to turn down an indie-indie movie made over three years. Yup. Three.

It really got me thinking, and not just about how to phrase the review but also if the tables were turned. If I spent three years of my life making a movie with my sibling how would it turn out? Brothers Coen and Wachowski get along, and the Afflecks are doing well. How would you keep motivated? I get bored waiting for VHS tapes to rewind, let alone a three year family event.

'From Hollywood to Hollywood' was made by two brothers Scott and Jeff Bushaw on a tiny budget and a big dream. It's not the kind of movie that gets reviewed on this blog with its period drama focus. (Clearly the brothers don't subscribe, they've just cast a wide net)

So was it watchable? I'll be blunt. It totally didn't suck! The script is as good as any gross-out comedy I'd pass up on the big screen. The acting is as serious as my Christmas rendition of Rocky Balboa, but if you made it through The Expendables you could handle this. It's hard not to think of it as a home movie, but who cares right? Everybody had fun.

What I did mind was how much I ended up caring about the downtrodden gay porn star brother Skyler. Shame on the writer for putting him (and me) through that debacle near the end; he deserves better. As for the loser older brother Dempster, this character is so awful he distracted me more from the movie than the amateur performances. Not even Adam Sandler movie sidekicks are this annoying!

If 'Road Trip', 'Harold and Kumar' or Adam Sandler movies 1996-2003 are your thing, From Hollywood to Hollywood is great for laughs. Keep writing, Scott. There's another blog post in three years with your name on it!

Game of Thrones 101

2010-12-07T00:11:00.000+11:00

Hi remember me? Something has stirred me from hibernation. I'll be taking things very slowly, starting with this youtube clip.
In 2011 the rest of the world will wake up to A Song of Ice and Fire. The first book, A Game of Thrones is getting made into an HBO tv series and here's the inside look.

Fanvid love for Game of Thrones

2010-08-15T00:46:00.000+10:00

Nothing says I love you like a tv series fanvid before it's even aired!
Watch this one in awe of all the beautiful people.

Courtesy of Xipriota

Here are some of my favourite characters from the story/series. Funny enough they're all underdogs.

Jon Snow

Tyrion Lannister

Blogposts will be short and infrequent until October - I've got trenches to dig, people and furniture to move and more travel.

Winter is Coming in Spring 2011

2010-08-08T17:58:00.001+10:00

Fantasy readers will know that some book series go on forever. Sadly, Robert Jordan died leaving his Wheel of Time series unfinished. Let that be a warning to you Mr George R R Martin. Eat healthy, exercise regularly and keep writing! The fate of too many fictional characters and unresolved plots is at stake.

I have mixed feelings about the HBO adaption of A Game of Thrones. Of course it's every fan's dream to see it realised with a big budget and fitting actors. There's a fantastic website with up to the minute news on the anticipated Spring 2011 release called Winter is Coming with a cast list longer than Little Dorrit, and that's only from the first book. BUT... what about the rest of the book series? I want my closure!

Image from HBO.com/game-of-thrones

There are only two series I've fantasized about adapting if I'd been tv writer. This one, A Song of Ice and Fire, and other one by Robin Hobb, The Farseer Trilogy. What sets these 2 writers apart from the seething mass of humdrum fantasy out there is character development. It deserves its own blog post where I can gush freely about my Farseer-love. I've converted plenty of people to Robin Hobb's writing, far more than the measly few who've taken to North and South! Has anyone read Robin Hobb? What did you think of Fitz and the Fool?

Inception, waking up and letting go

2010-08-01T21:17:00.001+10:00

Have you ever had a dream so enjoyable you didn't want to wake up? Or been so engrossed by something that you wanted to take the story further after it ended? (*cough* North and South)

There's a lot of hype about Christopher Nolan's latest movie with words like "stunningly complex" and "mind-blowing". That's bound to disappoint some people with the expectation of greatness already planted in their minds. Inception is a detailed allegorical movie that puts all its emotional eggs in one basket and shakes it all around.

It's a twist on the 'one last job of a heist movie' where waking up to find it was all just a dream is actually the aim! When you're unconscious you're left mentally unguarded, and people like Leonardo di Caprio and his posse can slip inside to steal your secrets. Something much harder to do is to subtly plant ideas which you'll remember after you awaken. Think 'The Matrix' meets 'Oceans 11' with some shades of 'Solaris'. Imagine you dreamed you went to sleep and dreamed you went to sleep and dreamt some more...get it?

Was it any good?? Well...yes. I'd recommend it to anyone who appreciates movies as a vehicle for new concepts or special effects. It's worth watching solely for THE COOLEST MOST ORIGINAL FIGHT SCENE EVER. Finally I can associate Joseph Gordon-Levitt with something other than Tommy from Third Rock from the Sun.

My favourite part of Inception (image from CinemaMerde.com)

It's pretty easy to see the allegory to film-making and the cinematic experience, but there are plenty of other interpretations, like substance addiction, online computer games, social networking sites and even religion. But with so much happening on screen there are bound to be weaknesses, three in fact.

1. The Ellen Page character, or Exposition Vehicle. She sees some weird stuff in Leonardo di Caprio's dreams and spends the rest of the movie nagging him like that buzzer on my alarm clock Monday mornings. Annoying!

2. You can spot Leonardo's big mysterious secret long before it's gravely and dramatically revealed. I hate it when that happens. Probably because I got a little confused at times that I had to guess ahead just to keep up with the story.

3. Only two characters get developed: Leonardo and the corporate guy #2, the rest are cool archetypal story props. I wouldn't have had a problem with this if the movie hadn't made such a big deal out of Leonardo's unresolved issues. All the recurring imagery is a powerful reminder of his guilt and regret, but at the emotional climax I wasn't convinced his character had earned the closure. In the interest of keeping this spoiler-free, I'll leave it at that.

Who's that on the front cover? Is it...

2010-07-29T21:33:00.000+10:00

I never pictured Rand so BUFF

If you read a lot of fantasy novels I'll bet at some point you've
1. Looked at the cover
2. Wondered "Is that ...? Nah, it can't be!...No seriously, what were they thinking?
3. Taken a closer look at hair colour, clothes, setting in the vain hope it's not who you think it is
4. Thought back to earlier books in the series in a desperate attempt to think of someone else it could be
5. Resigned yourself to a little giggle everytime you see the cover

It's happened to me for the Wheel of Time series. Conan the Barbarian has a lot to answer for.

Must Love Dogs

2010-07-27T20:33:00.000+10:00

A guy has a 20% higher chance of getting a girl's phone number if he's with his best friend - a dog. Scientifically proven, though I could've told them it's true for free. Actually we might be getting a dog in a few months so I watched this movie for puppy 'research' since the title implies 'here be much doggy feelgoodness'.

Turns out the movie's pretty light on the dogs and heavy on the punchlines. Let's put it through the Ragtag Romcometer, a measuring gauge made from all the Sandra Bullock comedies I'll admit to watching.

Ragtag Romcometer

While You Were Sleeping - highest rotation, taped from tv with commercials correctly paused out
Miss Congeniality - hehe *snort*

<------- Must Love Dogs - I'd watch it again for the John Cusack parts

Two Weeks Notice - wouldn't change the channel if it was up next
The Proposal - starts out well but got really bland
Forces of Nature - didn't finish it
Practical Magic - has a deserving place on the bonfire

Romcometer has decided that it ranks above the average Sandra Bullock romcom but WYWS and MC are still top dogs. The sheer number of one-liners per minute puts it in the top 3. It's easy to know the two leads will end up together because
a) It's a romcom, duh
b) They talk the same, think the same, act the same. John Cusack's character sounds like a self-absorbed neurotic but vulnerable woman in her late 40s. I thought he was sweet. Is that wrong?

Questioning my judgment

2010-07-25T01:19:00.004+10:00

It all started with Matt Damon searching high and low for WMD in Green Zone – excellent but uncomfortable viewing. Try imagining military Jason Bourne in

Iraq

. Cue the government conspiracy and the super human assassins.

There’s a particularly mean soldier named Briggs complete with evil frowny moustache that practically screams ‘kills if ordered or bored’. He’s so relentless nothing short of x-ray analysis will convince me he’s not a terminator sent from the future by hawk neoconservatives.

Alpha team, this is evil moustache, over

But then the shaky camera work stalled for a moment and I saw his face clearly. Hey that’s Jason Isaacs! No Matt Damon, don’t shoot! He’s still a baddy but now I don’t want Jason Isaacs to die!

What happened there? Ever since I saw Jason Isaacs play the (sexy) villain so well as Lucius Malfoy and Captain Hook I can’t help switching teams whenever he baddens it up. He’s built up enough rascal credibility I root for him even when the character’s flatter than an army buzz cut. But this isn’t an isolated case of wrong teamism. I thought back to Mulubinba’s search for the good Guy - a quest doomed to succeed. Why do we root for the bad guy? Perhaps it’s a personal thing. Here are my reasons:

They’re usually given the best lines

They’re usually given the best back stories

As long as they don’t hurt characters you like, you can still think they’re good people that made bad choices

They’re determined, proactive and ambitious; all misdirected but still attractive qualities.

They’re the underdog

No wonder they can overshadow the main character. Maybe there’s nothing wrong with my judgment after all.

What's your problem with Science Fiction?

2010-07-23T21:33:00.000+10:00

I'm back from travel and weeks of the flu! It'll take a few posts to get back in the pace, though. Here goes...
Admitting you're a fan of Sci Fi can be risky. You're a rung above saps who still believe in Santa, but one rung below Harry Potter fans, maybe two. I think Sci Fi has a bad rep because of goggle-eyed monsters and prosthetics. Maybe it's those weirdos dressed up as Hans Solo or that pointy eared guy on opening day of Star What 2500.

Don't roll your eyes. Trekkies and Star Warshipers are our cousins, period dramatists. The effort they put into spaceman costumes and amateur movies is admirable. Having written Sparkhouse fan fiction, reviewed Spooks 8 and watched every single Guy of Gisborne youtube fanvid I kinda see where they're coming from. Gee, did I just step out of the closet? (Just FYI if I were to dress up as anyone from RA's world it'd be Isabella Gisborne. No, Marian. No, Isabella.)

There are situations where I love Sci Fi and think creating a different world is worth the trouble: to explore radical ideas.

Like in... Solaris
George Clooney on a space station orbiting a planet which is alive. How does a sentient lonely planet meet and greet its new neighbours? With what's on their minds. I loved this psychodrama, the introspective 1972 version and the novel by Stanislaw Lem.

Like in... The Inhabited Island. Eastern European philosophers were particularly fond of using Sci Fi to get their anti-government literature past the sensors - so I've read.

Has anyone heard of this movie? I doubt it unless you speak Rusky. The Inhabited Island is about the fall of the Soviet Union in the same way Animal Farm is about the rise of the Stalin era, except it was written in the 60s. Grab a Russian, watch it together. Culture shocks don't hit any harder than this guy.

Blogging on my feet, far from home

2010-05-05T19:25:00.000+10:00

It's still not a good time to go back to blogging but I've got a 3 hour stoppover and none of the duty-free looks appealing.

It's such a waste to look Chinese but not be able to speak it. People expect me to burst into Mandarin but I only know how to say hello and Hong Kong. I've never appreciated my non-Asian colleagues as much as I do now. They exhude such a strong Aura of Foreigner it infects everyone within conversation radius, piercing my own Asianness as the locals try to accommodate for the Caucasian.

There are several stages I go through whenever I have to go overseas for extended periods:

1. Toilet Shock - Everyone's got their overseas toilet story. I could go on for hours! The building I'm working in has ONE FEMALE non-squat toilet in the whole building, the depravity. :( On my first day I discovered the 2nd one was out of order; as the flush water level rose (in slow motion) my life flashed before my eyes. I considered hightailing it out of there then remembered the dangerous 'step' on the raise and wet floor. I'm sure many a foreigner has met a damp toilet end with a deathmask of grossed-out horror. I never venture more than walking distance from my hotel or workplace. Yes I'm that much of a citygirl I can't pee in awkward positions.

2. Faking good habits - Getting up early, using cutlery properly, punctuality. You know, all habits I wish I had in my normal life but couldn't be bothered. Somehow when I go overseas it all comes naturally, at first.

3. Bright Side - Eating out here costs 1/5th what it does in Sydney. Every night I return to a tidied room and cleaned ensuite. There are no water restrictions - baths everynight! Then there's the public transport. I'm in LOVE with this country's high speed train network. They must be making a loss, I paid the same price for my intercity ticket as I did for the stupid tourist bag with the train logo on it! Look, I had to immortalise that life-changing train ride somehow and I didn't have a camera with me.

At this stage I start to think I could get used to living here if I could shake that anonymous drifter feeling.

Does anyone else go through similar stages?

Standing Cat Sees All

2010-04-08T01:48:00.000+10:00

Help! I've been stuck clicking replay for the past hour! Meet French Fashionista reincarnated as Standing Cat. It’s the middle of the night and I have to work tomorrow, but Standing Cat has powers beyond your imagination. Look at this showoff.

Video by DaisYannou, song "Cats on Mars" by Yoko Kanno

When the servants are out, kitty probably walks around the house in stilettos smoking catnip. If it wasn’t for tweety in the tree we’d have been none the wiser. I’m onto you Standing Tomcat! If you can stand that long you can learn the loo too.

-------------

Cats aside, there will be blogging break while I haul boxes and luggage here and there. With my opposable thumbs (beat that, wonder cat!) it shouldn't take longer than 2 months.

Guitar face for other badass instruments

2010-03-30T21:07:00.000+11:00

Why does the guitar get all the glory? Air guitar contests, Guitar face.

Image from blog.wfmu.org

For once I'd like to see a different 'instrument face'. Take for example, the zither, something I used to play. I'm sure if you look closely you can see zither face on these kickass ladies below:

Does anyone else have a soft spot for the rare musical instrument? The accordion and bagpipes are badass too; rebellion and anarchy rock out just as poignantly on the ol' pipes or 'cordz. Actually I think 'bagpipe face' is an occupational hazard.

I was pushing a lullaby by Vitas in my last post, this time his grandpa sings while Vitas pulls badass accordion face. Oh Vitas you wild thang.

(Unless you can understand Russian, skip ahead to 2 mins 10 sec.)

Opera crossover is taking me to dark and mysterious places

2010-03-26T22:39:00.001+11:00

What do heavy metal band Manowar and Queen of Soul Aretha Franklin have in common?

If you said Nessun Dorma, you're impressive. And a little disturbing.

Just when you thought you've seen everything (including the mad drum and guitar accompaniment at 2:35) here's a counter tenor cover by Vitas. Who's Vitas?

The question is not who, but WHAT is Vitas?

He likes to transform into Amphibian Man, dance robot (making funny tongue sounds) and sing about extraterrestrial friends. Whenever he cracks that high note my corneas detach.

I don't think we're in opera crossover anymore, Dorothy. I can't figure this amazing guy out, and maybe that's a good thing. Watch him sing this beautiful lullaby: not only is it a real baby, it's his daughter!

RA Fnstrvgnz Poll Results

2010-03-23T21:43:00.000+11:00

That's the wrap! Thanks to all those who voted, spilt punch, kicked the karaoke box and staggered away with the designated driver.

Here's the results, clicking the poll title will take you back...

When did you detect there was more to Thornton than Evil Cotton Overlord?
"Stevens!": 4%
"Meet my new friend and first proper pupil Mr Thornton": 24%
The Master's meeting: 1%
The 1000 mile stare: 9%
Margaret and John's tea tiff: 40%
"I believe I have seen hell, and it is white, snow white": 3%
"I would like to play the overbearing master": 5%
The Strike: 2%
The Proposal: 2%
The Train Scene: 5%
Other: 3% (Eg The credits)

What's your favourite Thornton heel spin moment?
The Proposal "I understand you completely" : 27%
"I'm looking to the future": 10%
The great exhibition: 21%
Margaret says goodbye Milton: 15%
At the train when Margaret gets her bag: 24%
When Margaret lies about her brother but Thornton sees the coat: 1%

The snidest comment from my failed conversion attempts:
This is just like Pride & Prejudice but with an ugly Darcy and crap Pemberley: 26%
I hate men who are like that with their mums. Gross: 2%
That guy's not leading man material. Look at his nose: 22%
That girl's fat: 10%
Her dad's piss-weak and her mum whines a lot: 2%
They're not very good Christians are they? They never pray: 4%
Is this another of your silly obsessions?: 18%
When does it get good?: 10%
As if that'd happen! They're in public!: 6%

Check out the cleanup at other RAF bloggers!

Avalon at Avalon's blog

Skully at The Spooks Fan Blog

Traxy at The Squeee

Mulubinba at An RA Viewer's Perspective

Susan at Me+Richard

Nat at The RA Fan Blog

Richard Armitage Fnstrvgnz Fan Showcase: Elva75!

2010-03-21T09:10:00.000+11:00

The end of the Richard Armitage Fnstrvgnz is approaching. Before the week is over I must get this out of my system: the song is echoing in my head! La-la-la, la-la...

You've probably seen Elva75's work, but may not know more than just a nickname. I've chosen to showcase her and her North and South fanvid 'Can't get you out of my head' since it's how North and South hit me.

That's some tune huh. I love that bit at 1:37 mins of the Master's meeting. There are some JT huffy exits, and fabulous editing at 3:10 as if Margaret and Thorton are in the same scene.

Here's a Q&A session with Elva and like all talented people she's gushy about what she loves. My inserts are in italics.

How long have you been a fan of Richard Armitage?

I fell head over heals for Richards portrayal of Mr. Thornton when I watched North and South in November of 2007 and haven't recovered since : )

How long have you been making fanvids? How did you learn to make them?

I started making fanvids in the spring of 2008, I just stumbled my way through Sony Vegas, not the easiest program to use, but I've been mastering it ever since.

What was your inspiration or driving force behind 'Can't get you out of my head' and 'Crazy in Love'?

Since I started vidding I havent been able to listen to the radio or any music really without constantly thinking about it as a potential candidate for a video. I really enjoy making period drama videos to unconventional songs and thats why I chose 'Can't get you out of my head', and the lyrics just fit Thornton and Margaret really well, the same goes with 'Crazy in love'.

What 'process' do you go through when making an artwork like a fanvid?

My 'Process' is quite simple, I hear a song and if it screams a certain pairing or film I won't rest until I've made something to it. I like playing with a bit of manipulation and Ive done quite a few Alternative Universe vids too which are really demanding. I always try my best to have a good flow in my videos, vidding is a bit like choreographing a dance routine : )

(From Wikipedia: Alternate Universe abbreviated AU, are what-ifs that explore the possibilities of pivotal changes made to characters' history, motivations or environment)

What is your favourite RA fanvid creation?

My favorite RA fanvid creation is 'Taking Over Me'. (This one rocks! - Ragtag)

It really shows a lot of my favorite RA moments in North and South. The one I like most in terms of technical standards is 'Untouched'.

Have you ever collaborated with other RA fans to create artworks?

Ive never collaborated with anyone else but I'd really like to try it one day.

I'd love to see the result of that too, Elva. Excuse me while I hit replay on that first tune. La-la-la...

Another Richard Armitage Fnstrvgnz Poll

2010-03-19T20:29:00.000+11:00

Spreading North and South love to our friends, we've all been there.
I've never had much luck, in fact I get a lot of snarky comments! Vote on the right hand panel for

The snidest comment from my failed N&S conversion attempts:

1. This is just like Pride & Prejudice but with an ugly Darcy and crap Pemberley

2. I hate men who are like that with their mums. Gross.

3. That guy's not leading man material. Look at his nose. (Grrrr)

4. That girl's fat

5. Her dad's piss-weak and her mum whines a lot (I don't disagree)

6. They're not very good Christians are they? They never pray.
7. Is this another of your silly obsessions?
8. When does it get good? (ugh)
9. As if that'd happen! They're in public!

Vote for the snidest comment on the right hand panel. Has this happened to you? What did people say?

Check out the other RAF bloggers!

Avalon at Avalon's blog

Skully at The Spooks Fan Blog

Traxy at The Squeee

Mulubinba at An RA Viewer's Perspective

Susan at Me+Richard

Nat at The RA Fan Blog

Enjoying the Fanstravaganazaaaaaaaaaa?

2010-03-17T19:48:00.003+11:00

Now that everyone's been mingling all around the blogs it's time for some serious soul searching.

Has anyone noticed that Mr Thornton loves a huffy exit in the opposite direction?

What's your favourite Thornton heel spin moment?

Not sure what I'm talking about? Here are some memory joggers.

The Proposal "I understand you completely" ... huff

"I'm looking to the future" ... huff

The great exhibition - If looks could kill,

Margaret says goodbye Milton. "Never to come back?" ... huff sniff

At the train when Margaret gets her bag - Technically it's Margaret that heel spins but Thornton hits back with his own anguished huffy.

There are other huffs too, so leave me a comment if you prefer one of those. Or just leave a comment anyway!

Remember to check out my fellow RA Fanstravaganza bloggers throughout the week for more...

Avalon at Avalon's blog
Skully at The Spooks Fan Blog
Traxy at The Squeee
Mulubinba at An RA Viewer's Perspective
Susan at Me+Richard
Nat at The RA Fan Blog

Richard Armitage FANSTRAVAGANZAAAAAAAAAAAA

2010-03-16T07:14:00.000+11:00

Welcome to the first ever Richard Armitage Fanstravaganzaaaaaaaaaaa!

An event such as this deserves caps lock. We RA-holic bloggers have decided to use our international powers of distraction for good, not evil, and host a BLOG CRAWL. From 16th to 23rd of March 2010 we will be hosting a series of polls and fan features. Blog hopping is highly advised! Tuesday morning the Aussie bloggers kick off celebrations. When it's Tuesday everywhere else, check out:

Avalon at Avalon's blog

Skully at The Spooks Fan Blog
Traxy at The Squeee
Mulubinba at An RA Viewer's Perspective
Susan at Me+Richard
Nat at The RA Fan Blog

Each blogger is hosting polls (and maybe more) at their site focusing on one of Richard's roles. Lucky me got North & South. (Score!) John Thornton was my introduction to RA and the reason for all the gushing these past few months. Special thanks to Nat for all the overlording and letting me on the bandwagon!

My polls will appear on the right hand panel. Check back for more...

So here's a little something familiar to start:

When did you detect there was more to Thornton than Evil Cotton Overlord?

Here are some amateur images to jog your memory.

"Stevens!"

"Meet my new friend and first proper pupil Mr Thornton"

The Master's meeting

The 1000 mile stare

Margaret and John's tea tiff

"I believe I have seen hell, and it is white, snow white" - I know he just walks, but the colour and lighting tell a different story, really!

"I would like to play the overbearing master"

The Strike

The Proposal

The Train Scene - hopefully earlier than this, but I figured this blog needs some lippy.

Please leave me a comment if your moment isn't one of the above. Vote on that right-hand panel!

Il Divo in Abu Dhabi, richful thinking

2010-03-03T22:01:00.003+11:00

Everyone gets asked this at some point: If you had 5 million dollars how would you spend it? Three mortgages ago the friendlier me would have said "I'd give it to charity, the things I want can't be bought with money." Of course the answer to our problems is world peace, and then they crowned me Miss Universe. *Royal wave*

Jen Hawkins, not me

Things are more complicated now that I understand deeply what that dumb kid said earlier about money.

Heads:

I'd wipe my three loans off the face of the earth, leaving me enough to buy front row tickets for Il Divo in Abu Dhabi. They're pretty cheap compared to the airfare from Sydney! I could get a great low light camera and take loads of pics and videos.

But then what? As relieving as a debt-free life must be (I can only reminisce) it's such a boring way to spend this blessing. It wouldn't even make a blip in my internet banking.

Tails:

When I was very little, a church group gave my family a gift that allowed us to leave the refugee camp for Oz. The older I get the more frustrated I become wanting to do something just as earthshattering, and I don't think it's pre- mid life crisis talk.

Is it a valid fear of not paying it forward? I dunno. Sometimes this debt of conscience bothers me more than the three mortgages. You could do a lot with five million. Better play some Il Divo to inspire me.

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My blind date: An Evening with Il Divo

2010-02-25T23:02:00.002+11:00

Last year my scrawny sister and I picked out a BIG tv at the store, and it was quite a feat of engineering getting it home and up 4 flights of stairs. It’s black, shiny, and looks as out of place in my living room as the obsidian monolith among the primates in 2001 A Space Odyssey.

It’s reproducing too, a little blu-ray player was delivered a few days ago with some blu-ray disks. One of the disks has taken up permanent residence and refuses to budge, so every evening has since become ‘An evening with Il Divo’. Scooch over Mr Armitage, make room for some operatic pop on the block.

Carlos Marín, David Miller, Sébastien Izambard and Urs Bühler

Now I understand why males went gaga for the Spice Girls. Ooh, it’s raining men, Armani men, men who can really SING! Their voices have become my comfort food and I don’t care if they look like catwalk models doing freelance vocal work. Well done Simon Cowell, all is forgiven.

In a way, my Richard Armitage obsession has prepared me well for this fling. The Thornton effect doesn’t look so bad next to realising I’ve skipped a generation and turned into my grandmother! Or at least have her taste in music. If they ever tour Australia again I’ll be there dancing the salsa in my Il Divo t-shirt, hat and underwear while my partner sits back with the other bored husbands. A lot of critics dismiss them as a manufactured boy band, but this is unfair. Mature women deserve eye candy too.

Do you live in a melting pot or salad bowl? Il Divo is one: Sébastien is French, Urs Swiss, Carlos Spanish and David American. Cultural stereotypes aside, meet the men behind the voices…

Séb

Sébastien is the self-taught French pop musician from an impoverished childhood. Despite the lack of formal lessons and classical training he still blends well. His lighter voice has more emotive flexibility compared to the rumbling engines of the others. Sébastien seems the most vulnerable, gentlemanly and humble. He ties a mean-looking scarf and gets the most undies thrown at him.

Dave

David the American has a powerful tenor voice with a Broadway and opera background. He’s the bouncy joker with a double gum grin, Tintin hairdo and Kevin Bacon looks. Most of the time his comic personality is tightly reined by the classy Il Divo style but occasionally the wild toothy giggle bursts the bubble.

Dave slam dunks those high notes with such force it can get on the non-operatic nerves if not controlled properly. He’s the only one I’d heard of before he joined Il Divo thanks to Baz Luhrmann’s version of La Bohème. Poor David is also the only non-polylingual of the group - Carlos and Sébastien speak three languages, Urs speaks five. FIVE?!? I should’ve been born somewhere land-locked with four national languages - English being the unofficial fifth one.

Carlos

Carlos the explosive Spanish baritone is the only guy who could carry the whole concert if the other three abruptly lost their voices. He’s like the rugged Tom Jones of opera and Spanish musical theatre with his rich rumbling sound. And what a flirt! He’s got a twinkle in his eye, a million dollar smile and dancing eyebrows. His voice will make your knees tremble; his hair will make you mentally button up his shirt.

Urs

Urs the Swiss tenor is the reason people think Il Divo were chosen for their cheekbones and physique. This guy looks like he’s stepped off a catwalk or perfume ad with that sculpted androgynous look. His sweet lyric voice reminds me of Gregorian chanting for some musical reason I don't know the technical term for. Urs’ passions are precision, order, motorbikes and heavy metal. This guy has great hair but has to tuck it behind the ears a lot. He should take tips from Carlos and cement it down with gel and spray.

Feasible isn't it

Some people have an issue with Il Divo’s cheesy romance music. Who cares? It's not in English anyway: anything sung in a foreign language is more exotic. I recommend watching their concert rather than just listening to the CD. The translation will never be as good as the poetry playing out in your head, and their live performance chops make their studio recordings sound bleached bland in comparison.

Each of the singers had established solo careers pre-Divo, why filter their individuality? I guess it’s because of the Il Divo brand, but I hope in the future they show more of themselves on the music videos. Emotionally of course! Maybe in cravats and stately houses? Someone tell their people STAT.

As for the format it came in, ‘An Evening with Il Divo’ looks fabulous on a big widescreen tv and high definition. With a small screen you’ll miss out on a lot of detail you never knew was there. I watched their ‘Live at the Greek Theatre’ on DVD and it was worlds apart in picture quality. It also shows how far they’ve come in dropping the faux Romeo and showing more of themselves.

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Sylvester the audiobook

2010-02-02T12:02:00.002+11:00

This is my first RA purchase from envy. After several hollow North and South conversion attempts, I started to think no one in real life would understand. Suddenly my friend Ally exclaimed she has a copy of Sylvester. WHAT?! My obsession is bigger than yours. Quick, douse those jealous flames with emergency retail therapy and free shipping. Richard Armitage I thought it was over, but we were just on a break.

Mugshots. That's NOT Sylvester on the cover.

What delayed my Sylvester fulfillment was a distrust of anything abridged, and the fruitless search for the library book. I'm a purist; unless a novel is very thick, very bad, or by Robert Jordan, I want the director's cut. As compensation I've read a few other Georgette Heyer novels: Bath Tangle, A Civil Contract, Arabella all in large print, the book equivalent of first row cinema seats.

Methinks there be sexual tension in her gaze, wouldn't you agree ~~Duke~~ Mr Beaumaris?

28 year old Sylvester thinks he can objectively choose a female to complete him based on this formula: breeding, money, and beauty. As a duke his greatest vice is pride, his greatest weapon the snub. Most ladies of society bore him, and rightly so, for he's left out all human measures like humour, intelligence and kindness.

Phoebe however, is too genuine to hide her dislike of him for long. She reflects privately with Sylvester at what is ridiculous at their social gatherings, and more publicly at what is offensive beneath his faultless manners. A scene at the Blue Boar inn demonstrates how a duke measures up against that universal currency, the turkey: "Dukes is more important than a gobblecock, even if he is a prime young'un" which sends his love interest into a fit of giggling.

Sylvester meets the family - Mr Thornton has been lent out on conversion

This audiobook is one of my favourite Heyers so far, but all her aristocratic heroes are starting to blend. There's only so many ways a proud rich man can get knocked down a few notches and then married. It's too late though, I'm hooked. Hero in a Heyer world, how do I love thee? Listen up:

1. Do not rescue damsels in distress unless you wish to marry one
2. Beware the feisty lady who does not care a fig for your money
3. To impress said feisty lady, adopt a mangy dog or child like you mean it
4. Then pay her family's debts like you care
5. Ignore your mother/grandmother's words at your peril

Did anyone else do a mental casting call as they listened to Richard Armitage? RA, Mark Strong or Toby Stephens for satyrical Sylvester, Rachel McAdams for Phoebe - maybe she's too pretty. My favourite scene: when the wicked uncle is reunited with his scrumptious nephew, and Phoebe laughs. In another life, I'd adapt Sylvester for the big or little screen; it's so Austenish I'm sure most plebeians like me could be fooled.

Sylvester moves in

I can't help comparing this reading to Lords of the North though they're such different stories. Despite being the far better audiobook, LOTN is too brutal to revisit often, whereas I could play Sylvester every day. How did RA keep the pacing and voices so consistent throughout all the hours? I gave it a go myself and couldn't maintain more than 3 voices at a time, and that was in just 3 pages.

Still miffed about the deleted scenes in Sylvester, I'm waiting to get the book for more detail (unresolved chemistry) at Green Street and the Channel. The last 2 CDs suffered the most cuts, it's obvious whenever the story lurched forward and several characters all but disappear from the reading. Next up, Venetia, abridged again. Drat!

Firelight, Sophie Marceau très chic despite décolletage hump

2010-01-24T13:29:00.009+11:00

Here is a period drama with arthouse aspirations. What is an arthouse movie, or do we call them indie movies now? In primary school I thought they were weird foreign movies that won awards. Now they’re a way to punish my partner when he makes me watch five Battlefield 2142 trailers in a row.

Firelight (1997) is a movie with Ms Marceau, her monoboob and the pleasant surprise of Stephen Dillane. My friend Ally recommended it so I’ll try to review it seriously, extolling its virtues and be nicer than usual. This review has mild spoilers but nothing you wouldn’t learn from seeing the movie posters.

“She was hired to have a child. The love was free.”

Really? This was the tagline? There goes my straight face. I didn’t even make this up, it’s from here. Let’s start again.

The first scene in Firelight feels like a 17^th century painting in motion. It tempts us with mystery and foreshadowing; the darkness lifts to reveal an empty chair and an oil lamp.

A young woman approaches warily and is kindly told to sit down.

The voice belongs to an older female out of view also whispering to another concealed person. An interview takes place with personal questions to the young woman, now shown in profile.

Suspense is heightened as neither the young or older woman are revealed close-up front-on until well into the scene. Even the third person, a gentleman, is hidden behind a screen from where he watches the young lady.

She needs money to pay her father’s debts but does not want to commit marriage to obtain it, revealing to us that she enjoys her freedom and is reluctant to marry for money. The firelight’s muted reflection flickers on the lacquered screen.

Although nervous, the young lady finds her strength and insists that the gentleman ask the questions himself. He is surprised at her daring and asks what she can tell from direct words. In turn, his voice startles her and us; it is gentle, curious, and unlike the others before it, deep and masculine. He chooses her for the task but we aren’t told what it is yet – ignoring the poster and tagline.

This scene concisely establishes the personalities of the two main characters. We see the dominant will and intelligence of the young lady despite her lower station, her grace and poise at odds to the uncomfortable interview and other indignities she has agreed to undertake.

We are also introduced to the man’s persistence on formality and secrecy, and delaying our view of him adds to the tension. There is a curious visual parallel; although she is the one evaluated like an animal in a zoo, he is the one ‘caged’ behind the crosshatch screen. She can only hide herself with composure and a smooth face.

When we finally meet the gentleman, the view is gorgeous. As if we’ve stumbled upon his hiding place, the side profile shot suggests concealment and reluctance to engage. Contrasting with her, he has an uncontrollably expressive face. No wonder he needed a screen, in the firelight his thoughts seem to glow and burn him.

This warrior needs liquid courage before the battle. It’s awkward for both of them, but she’s clearly the stronger one - perhaps she has less to lose. At the time I didn’t see what was such a big deal for him. You need no brandy goggles for this beauty, she’s luminous by any light.

Only Sophie Marceau could make a monoboob look classy. On anyone else it’d look like a camel hump on the wrong side. She’s so chic it hurts. That little downturned pout, those melancholy eyes. “I’m too sexy for zis film”.

Seven years later the young lady Elizabeth Laurier has tracked down her daughter. Disregarding the agreement she gets a position as governess to her own child. It happens too quickly; I would have liked to see some struggle as she investigated her three-night stander, or the hardship she faced as a governess. Something to pump up the sympathy a little. Her impassive face serves great as body armour but keeps the viewer at an emotional distance.

Lake houses, glass corridors, icy fields and stony grand rooms; this movie is full of distant ethereal vistas. Her firmly calm beauty matches the frigid landscape but hides a fierce cleverness and persistent streak. I feel needy just watching the back of her head. Please Ms Marceau, teach me how to hide my thoughts so even I won’t know what I’m thinking.

I don’t know whether it’s the writer or the editor, but someone thinks the audience has the memory of a goldfish and persistently reminds us of how Firelight affects the room and the time-space continuum. For goodness sakes, it was cheesy the first time, but to repeat it over and over is torture.

"Firelight makes time stand still ...When you put out the lamps and sit in the firelight's glow there aren't any rules any more. ...when the lamps are lit again, time starts again, and everything you said or did is forgotten..."

I love Stephen Dillane in this role, even though his suffering character Charles Godwin is such a drip. Miserably trying to do the right thing in all the wrong ways. Unable to control himself or his family situation, he has an iron will over what parts he can oversee. He’s a good sheep breeder having spent 15 years culling hereditary imperfections. There’s the rub, how can he be so good at raising sheep but such a crap father? Aren’t these skills transferable? They both involve kids don’t they - or is that goats? Anyway, less time raising the perfect ewe, more time raising your girl.

Miss Elizabeth Laurier on the other hand, no power over her own situation or future, but total power over herself, or she did have until Mr Godwin came along. They have a lot in common, both trapped in their roles dictated by gender and class. She also enjoys controlling what parts of her life she can, education, painting and choice of husband.

The other reason I don’t like Mr Godwin is he's totally blind to the fact that his sister-in-law is in love with him! Why go to all the trouble and expense of finding a stranger to bear your heir when there’s someone just as qualified who’ll do it for free? Five hundred pounds down the drain if you ask me. They should have given the sister-in-law some awful hereditary affliction which would drive him to seek a fresh gene pool; otherwise it makes him look silly and undermines the whole premise of the movie.

But who cares? There’s great build up and hot hot sex. This blog permits no adult-rated content, so I had to make do with what someone sent me. I think the one on top is Miss Laurier.

The best movies end with the characters learning something, but by the end (even if it made me cry) I wasn’t sure any of the mains had learnt anything I enjoyed watching. Firelight starts far stronger than it finishes, and the artful first scene's been watch about 10 times.

I did learnt something though. How did the fire lit scenes feel so sensual when the characters were so reluctant to be there – at first? Crank up mystery and suspense, then the close-ups will give a feeling of intimacy despite the discomfort. The warmly illuminated faces against a dark background hint to many more concealed thoughts. It's helped by the sensory contrast to the ocean or snow scenes with distant and forbidding figures. Anonymity is assured; we are too far for recognition let alone read the expression on their faces.

It's a shame this movie is not well known. Does anyone remember seeing it advertised? Has anyone else seen it? If not, I recommend it for the romance or Sophie Marceau fans.

3.5 monoboobs out of 5.

I know you're reading Ally what do you think? You’re not the only Firelighter out there now. What makes this one of your favourites?

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There are lots of good reviews online. Maybe Ally and I aren't the only ones who've seen it.

Oh joyous day! Sylvester has arrived

2010-01-20T15:08:00.000+11:00

At long last (3 weeks) my copy of the Sylvester audiobook has arrived at Aussie shores. I've arranged an early morning pickup at the local parcel post so that baby will be delivered into MY desperate sweaty hands from the post woman tomorrow 0630.

Review pending!

Power of Communities: Cranford, Lars and the Real Girl and of course, Richard Armitage

2010-01-10T15:33:00.003+11:00

What makes a community? I think all you need is a bunch of people with something in common. There will be a kinship between community members, and an exclusivity that non-members will notice. I think you see where this is going.

Cranford

Cranford is a community love affair. It’s a mini-series set in the 1840s with funny endearing characters in a close-kit small town where nothing much happens. They take their community very seriously, and through strict adherence to customs and traditions they’ve preserved it against harmful external influences.

New neighbours!

Cranford sees itself as a place unlike others, and the townsfolk remark clear differences when there are newcomers. Dr Harrison and other newbie Cranfordians are insensitive to the social blunders they make and the damage they cause all because they don’t ‘speak the language’ ie haven’t learnt the rules.

Simon Woods as Dr Harrison

It’s Mr Bingley from Pride and Prejudice 2005 all grown up and not a redhead

The community has a strong sense of identity and protects itself from any great threats such as the all-consuming harbinger of doom, the Railway. It will bring the masses, ie criminals and people who won’t conform to Cranford rules. Do you 'belong' to a geographical community? Sometimes think I do: when teasing people from more southern states about their bad weather, or when I meet an Aussie while travelling overseas.

Not so much with my local community. The house next door had a drug-related triple shooting, and since then I’ve kept a distance. I’ve never taken part in any kind of community protest, but wish something could have been done to prevent the glut of high rise apartments in my suburb. Do you feel a part of your local community, or do you just wish you were?

Lars and the Real Girl

I saw Lars and the Real Girl yesterday, and was so touched my eyes watered for about half the movie - don’t laugh! It could happen to you. At first this movie doesn’t seem to have much to do with communities. A chronically shy guy named Lars (played by Ryan Gosling) buys a life-size doll, calls her Bianca and thinks she's a real person. Wait for it…

Lars translates the church sermon to her since she doesn't speak much English yet.

He introduces his ‘girlfriend’ to his relatives, and when the local doctor/psychologist prescribes that the doll is a necessary crutch to help Lars function while his emotional or mental wound heals, they play along. More than that, Lars lives in a small isolated town, and after everyone’s had their obligatory awkward moment or sex joke, they ALL play along.

Yes, they bathe her too

It’s so touching how much the town bends over backwards to integrate Bianca into their lives as if she actually is a Real Girl. The doll -in concept- is an empty slate on which you can write anything, and through her, Lars is able to safely project all his affection, voice his fears and doubts. For the town, the doll is their only way of showing they care for shy Lars since there's no other way to help him. Wouldn't it be great if we could display our eccentricities as bravely as Lars and be loved all the more for it?

Richard Armitage

I just realised what a long and ambitious post this has become. Too…many…issues. Is anyone still reading? If you are, then know this: I think I’m weird too. Not life-size doll weird! But in real life I have quirks. At minimum my latest obsession with Richard Armitage. Thank goodness for the internet where I’ve found a place of safety to gush and goo where no-one will know!

I don’t want to draw a strong parallel between Lars’ doll and Richard Armitage ok, but the man/his work is a focal point around which fanvid, fanfic and blogging communities have developed. Take a look at the some of the forums, how many people logged on in the past 24 hours? Amazing huh? Thanks to Mulubinba I discovered there was an IMDB forum too. What other forms does RA appreciation take on that I don’t know of yet?

Some youtube vid surfaced where RA walked a few metres on the red carpet at a public event, and look what happened! – Nat that’s a record number of comments. I feel like a bloodhound whenever there’s new footage of him, but once viewed I don’t really think more on it. I’m more interested in how other people react. For a figure most of us have never met, we feel we know him a little (maybe that's just me), care about whether he’s had a good feed over Christmas, whether he’s got anyone to share the holidays with.

I’m not sure which one causes more comments, Richard as himself or in character, but his interviews and public appearances never fail to bring on chatter spikes. The larger forums have moderators, on small sites anything goes. With so many RA websites out there, you can pick your poison and feel at home. About that footage, personally I’d love RA to have a significant other since I've heard acting is a lonely business. I don’t care who it is but she’ll need a thick skin. Good luck to the blogger with her 5 year plan to nab him and have his babies.

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Welcome to Cranford. You have 15 minutes

2010-01-07T22:13:00.003+11:00

Imelda Staunton as Miss Pole

In Cranford news travels by short bouncy woman. Being the town tweeter is a lofty responsibility to Miss Pole. That feather antenna can sniff a story just whispers away from scandal, and also helps her look taller.

Eileen Atkins as Miss Deborah

The long hand of justice smells of rosewater and lavender. As magistrate of manners, Miss Deborah upholds etiquette as Cranford law. Her power of disapproval guards the town against errant behaviour, social calamity and vulgar poses while sucking your orange.

Judi Dench as Miss Matty

This gentle spinster proves 60 is the new 50. Miss Matty wouldn't just turn the other cheek, she'd roll over and let you scratch her tummy... oops that's Cranford cat. Her pliable nature allows change and compromise. She stumbles into the heroine spot as a dark horse in bonnet and lace.

A friend told me "You're like an old woman!". I hope it's my wisdom and maturity, but I think she meant my quirks and set opinions. I do see myself in these 3 ladies.

Me as Miss Matty:
I shouldn't blog about chemistry or cookbooks; too many liquids. Does anyone want more jasmine tea? I can still make that last coach to Manchester.

As Miss Deborah:
On this blog the following terms are deemed undignified: bending, peach-sucking and big nose. Let us retire to our rooms to think of those terms in solitude.

As Miss Pole:
My partner liked Cranford so much he made screencaps! Now what do you think of THAT?

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Spooks 8 - 8 Finale

2010-01-02T11:05:00.005+11:00

I know what you’re thinking.

I’m thinking the same thing: Lucas/Ros/Home Secretary love triangle. Forbidden lust between a Spooks section chief and the politician she’s sworn to protect. Only one colleague knows of it but harbours his own foolish passion, he keeps a yellow Rose in his pocket. This fanfic’s begging to be written. Who’s with me...

Lucas whips out a leatherman

So that's the wrap, no more Richard Armitage as Lucas North for nigh a year. The whole episode felt really condensed from the rush to get dialogue out; after Ros and Lucas get to the hotel things really crackled but I was left wanted more. This can’t be it! I missed half of it from the shaky cam. Despite the ominous foreshadowing the writers haven’t taken the Nightingale thread anywhere very revealing. I’ve been gunning for Sarah Caulfield’s death since they met at the morgue and nothing short of public execution would do.

Sarah: I'm not really american. I'm not even a real blond!

Lucas: What next, that's not your real hair?

The build-up to a finale should feel like the need to pee. It should grow stronger and stronger before that desperately glorious moment of relief, thus ending the series. You can hold back a little info to make a cliff hanger, but We the Viewers deserve a satisfying end to one or two plot threads; we didn’t even get to see Sarah Caulfield die! Instead of a loud popping death it snuck away behind our backs, and Lucas was all misplaced torment visited by the ghost of ep6.

How cute are they?

I think Nat had something of a premonition when she chose a picture of Ros and Lucas for her caption contest. Both are so driven, she gives orders and he follows. Those two are so compatible I thought the writers gave them too much dialogue. No need for words, they understand each other completely. Jokes and small talk can stay though.

Has anyone tried Vietnamese civet poo coffee? (You knew sooner or later I’d resort to toilet humour) After asking a relative about this stuff I was told that Crappajoe costs 10 times a normal cup due to labour costs. The civet is a picky eater so it eats only the best beans, its digestive acids and enzymes do good things.

How cute are THEY?

HS = Home Secretary = flirty gerty. I love him all needy and vulnerable around authority figures. Fondly stroking his tie when she’s around, he’s perfect for Ros. "He was actually quite relaxed without Harry there. I found him strangely..." What was next before Lucas cut in? “Sensual”? When she was dragging him along the hotel carpet I wished she’d been injured earlier to make their thwarted escape more believable. She can slam a man twice her size, why can’t she drag this guy?

Friends of Little Guy

I like the dilemma they created with the bomb. They’ve upped the likeability on HS and Ros for a super nerve-wracking climax, but also I wanted the bomb to go off faster to rid the world of that awful caricature tied to a chair. Ros can walk away from her lie the victor because he’s not only a traitor but sexually repugnant as well.

Does anyone else think less of Lucas after the mess of Sarah? It’s a shame that this relationship has killed his credibility and good comebacks. (“Back off, Ros”) Instead of delivering punch lines he's become one! The path to unlikeable is paved with viewer revolt. I mentally mutiny when he even THINKS about Sarah. Do you think Richard’s powers of superbrood worked against him here? Now I know how the Robin Hood fans felt as they saw their fave characters given up to plotlines so ridiculous week by week.

Lucas can't believe it's over

This source confirms Spooks 9. Next time I want Lucas to learn from his mistakes. Hopefully he’ll spend the whole series fighting off the advances of a new Spooks recruit because he's been burnt before. Either that or no love interest at all - I've run dry on evil analogies. As for the other Spooks I hope Harry doesn’t stand around getting ignored again. Give him a Sugarhorse or something. Oh, and by some miracle, Ros and HS survive the blast and head for the beaches of Barbados. Or Bolivia, you choose.

Cranford Cat

2009-12-29T21:35:00.000+11:00

Look what I found in my inbox...

Cranford cat!

I haz lace. Meow.

I forced my partner to watch Cranford ep1 with me and this must be a manly way of hinting he wants to see the rest! Oh joy!

The ladies of Cranford, hear them roar

My credibility meter has just dropped 10 points but can anyone find cat or dog pics in camouflage a-la Strike Back?

From http://graphicshunt.com

Avatar

2009-12-29T13:16:00.002+11:00

When you watch Avatar you are shown two movies. That wasn’t just a bad 3D technology pun. I mean that one movie is ‘Avatar the loudly great special effects wonder that James Cameron took 12 years to make’, and the second is ‘Avatar the movie’, just the movie.

Teaser poster from wikipedia

I saw the second movie; my partner saw the first movie and found it an eye-opening breathtaking experience. He doesn’t care to go see Sherlock Holmes anymore because “It can't compare to Avatar”. His 3D obsession rivals my Richard Armitage one and he sees James Cameron as a creative visionary. I'm so jealous! Why couldn't I see that movie instead of the second one?

Which one would you see? Do you appreciate attention to detail in visual style and setting? Or do you relegate it to background filler while you’re tangled up in the inner conflicts of the characters. Not sure? Let’s try another analogy. Imagine you’re in a restaurant with an awe-inspiring view, but your meal tastes pretty plain. What would you take away from the experience?

This is as much as I know about the special effects process.

Avatar didn’t make me feel like a kid again, but darnit I wished I was one to appreciate the spectacle better. The movie’s forest world is filled with fantasy elements I would die for 20 years ago. The closest thing back then was The Neverending Story and Michael Jackson music videos. It's a nice preview of the Night Elf race in the upcoming World of Warcraft movie - or so I heard.

Big Movies become a measurement standard for later ones to outdo. In the SFX genre both my yardsticks are James Cameron movies Terminator 2 and Titanic where the effects bolstered the story, but in Avatar they eclipsed it and left me with an uneven feeling. The script plays out like a first draft and the main character comes off pretty weak.

Don't worry Jake, I'll carry the second movie

Neytiri played by Zoe Saldana is the most believable character, Navi or human. I think part of her success stems from not just relying on facial expressions but using her whole body. CGI faces are still a little Barbie-doll but her ultra expressive body gestures distract us and compensate for this. Unfortunately for Sam Worthington who plays Jake the leading character, his acting style is more subtle and post Smurf stretching he ends up pretty wooden.

The other weakness is the plain storytelling. Maybe if the big bad military guy cracked better jokes?... Jake is supposed to be our eyes into the Avatar world but he feels flat. The plot turns him traitor before it convinced me his inner demons justified the destruction of Neytiri's homeland, and no that’s not a spoiler. You knew what you were in for, just like Jake! There were times when I wished we weren’t stuck to his point of view but jumped on Neytiri’s more solid shoulder instead; through her I mourned the loss of the Omaticaya’s collective history and integrated way of life.

I'll stop whining now. The big screen is the best place for the spectacle and the cool Navi but don't let the 1D human characters spoil the fun. It's ok Mr Cameron I still believe in you, your SFX vision and your strong female characters. When Battle Angel comes out I'll prebook my tickets at the local IMAX, but please don't make me wait 12 years.

Strike Back novel and cast of the tv adaption

2009-12-23T20:24:00.002+11:00

Last time Richard Armitage wore shirts that pulled taut across the biceps he was reading bedtime stories. Those body-hugging tees are set to appear again in Strike Back. Green is good.

It bugs me when he has to share the limelight in ensemble shows like Spooks. Finally he's the lead again, even if we have to wait until April 2010 for someone to upload the torrent. Your mission is to study this image. Commit every detail to memory.

The hunter stalks his prey.

Unaware of the synchronous salivation of so many hungry-eyed predators.

Their hive-like minds trained on him with sniper intensity.

I've started reading the book by Chris Ryan aka Colin Armstrong and at the halfway point I've decided not to spoil the tv experience by reading the ending. I've got enough info about the main characters by now, and can make some sense of the cast listing on IMDB, but a lot of the names don't register.

Richard Armitage: John Porter (6 episodes)

"On the eve of the invasion of Iraq in 2003, John Porter leads a Special Forces unit on a daring hostage rescue into the heart of Basra, events overtake our hero with disastrous results. The decisions taken on that night inexorably unite the fate of both Porter and Collinson. Porter bares the burden of guilt and the repercussions haunt him for seven years, until an opportunity presents itself for him to return to Iraq and redeem himself." excerpt from here.

They've transported the hostage rescue from Lebanon 1989 to Iraq 2003, and I didn't think Porter was leading the unit - he tells us he's the least experienced of the 5 man team. The repercussions mentioned haunt him only half the novel's 14 years, poor Porter Porter - sorry, insider joke. Who's brilliant idea was it to do a search and replace on the most common English name? Every time it's supposed to say John, it says Porter instead. Thus Porter Porter, and Elton Porter who sang 'Candle in the wind' after Diana died.

Shelley Conn: Danni (6 episodes)
Danni's a nurse in her mid 20s. In the novel JP's been a homeless man full of infections and vitamin deficiencies, and she's the one that gives him the jabs.

Laura Greenwood: Alexandra Porter (6 episodes)
Not sure why they changed JP's daughter's name from Sandy to Alexandra.

Andrew Lincoln: Hugh Collinson (6 episodes)
JP's nemesis. You can tell in the book he's a wanker because he's named Peregrine. What kind of parent does that to their kid?

Jodhi May: Layla (6 episodes)
She's a no-nonsense intelligence officer.

Colin Salmon: Middleton (4 episodes)
I don't remember a Middleton.

Nicola Stephenson: Diane Porter (3 episodes)
JP's long-suffering wife.

Orla Brady: Katie Dartmouth (2 episodes)
A journalist in the novel, a Middle East correspondent here.

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Ewen Bremner: Gerald Baxter (2 episodes)
I don't remember any Geralds in the novel, but Ewen Bremner should look familiar to Spooks fans.

David Harewood: Tshuma (2 episodes)
Don't remember a Tshuma either. But he's Tuck from RH3.

Dhaffer L'Abidine: Hakim Al Neseri (2 episodes)
Maybe this guy comes up later in the book, maybe not.

Cal Macaninch: Major Chris Pemberton (2 episodes)
Finally a name I remember. JP reports to this guy in the SAS.

Mick 'Stuntie' Milligan: Charlie Company squad leader / (2 episodes)
Isn't this guy the stunt co-ordinator too? I couldn't find a picture for him except for a really tiny dodgy one that probably isn't him anyway.

Fenar Mohammed-Ali: Hassad (2 episodes)
Originally Lebanese, but I suppose now Iraqi.

Shaun Parkes: Stone (2 episodes)
Don't know who he is.

Alexander Siddig: Sharq (2 episodes)
Sorry, wish I could be of more help.

Toby Stephens: Arlington (2 episodes)
I don't know who this is, but I suspect he'll have an acerbic wit.

So it's nice to see some RH3 actors in this. It may be because one of the casting department Victor Jenkins was casting director or associate for RH2?

So back to the book. It's an action story which is very simply written and a cinch to adapt. It's not meant to be studied. Believe me, you don't want to dwell on the poor proofreading. There's plenty to improve on, but if you imagine an episode of Ultimate Force or Spooks on a global scale there you have it.

Maybe comparing it to Ultimate Force is too simplistic. There's no bald guy with a weird 'serious' face that looks like he's poking fun at himself. I've been watching a lot of Spooks so my credibility radar is on the blink but I can see a potentially excellent adaption. Superficially both stories involve SAS, but Strike Back is all about redemption and second chances. There's a lot of useful raw material here. I can't wait to see it.

Spooks 8 - 7

2009-12-19T10:00:00.001+11:00

Last week Lucas and Sarah tried to trick us with instant mix melodrama. Never mind, the patchy pathos left as abruptly as it came. Lucas is back in touch with his inner superspy, and it's business as usual for Ros, poster girl for the freedom to shoot puppy-eyed innocents blocking a shot of the bad guys. The world makes sense again, Richard Armitage as Lucas is trying to prevent an attack on Muslims by Hindus and MI5 finds out more about that evil Nightingale group.

Lucas: How do you get your hair like that?

Ashok: Go easy on the conditioner

Reviewing Spooks 8 is the closest I've gotten to making a lasting commitment. As a tv viewer I'm a bit of a floozy, and when reviewing it's easier to gush about what I love or love to hate. It's harder with vanilla, and everything on Spooks without RA was vanilla until the cling-wrap session with Ros. Unbelievably I've coughed up for 7 episodes, although ep3 was touch-and-go but I've compensated by giving ep6 double time. The painful part is having to pick apart why something didn't work - it feels like the reflective introspection after an argument when I turn on myself, "Was I too harsh about him begging to be Bella-man to her Edward?...Nah"

I feel woefully unqualified to review this episode about unresolved tensions between Britain and its former colonies India and Pakistan. So I'll try and approach it more generally as being about anger and prejudice. I used to think I had lots of one and little of the other, but after an oddly profound moment I realised it could be a chicken and egg thing.

Too bright to be London

Our extremist of the week is carrying around a whole lot of rage and X-men paraphernalia. I thought wrongly that his violent stabbing scene took place in a south Asian country, how was I supposed to know we were still in Britain? People were wearing off-white. For once it wasn't matching navy and black, the usual chromatic proclamation of a London setting. It even took me a while to figure out Midtone man wasn't the guy that got stabbed. Maybe his colour preference was meant to show which side he's really on, but it's hard to look badass in all that beige. Dhillon the demon football coach does a much more convincing job. I've always suspected extra-curricular team sports were a front for evil, if this guy had been at my school I would've ended up a stain on the floor the day I faked a stomach cramp.

Spooks 8 has been touching on the idea that unrelenting actions of MI5 agents can have severe consequences. It parallels the historical mistreatment of British colonies and current involvements in Asia and the Middle East giving storyline a broader scope. We saw some fallout for Ros after Jo's death and now we see it in how they handled this conflict. At first it's Ruth who balks at their treatment of a 17 year old, then we see Tariq cut up about that kid they phone-hacked. Lucas already threatened Ashok to turn up for the meeting and so forced him to pose as attacker and hostage-taker. Of course there's a reason for it that thousands more could die if it didn't happen, but for civilians threatened into a furious corner it is harder to accept certain death as a moral or civic duty. People balk at jury service let alone an accusing terrorist with a loaded gun. Which is why the audience is behind Ashok every step. All he wanted was to chase a ball around and suddenly he's got a microphone in his watch and receiver in his orifice.

As this week's innocent, Ashok was as interesting as Baisley and a whole lot better looking. Look at his peepers! He could be the new face of Maybelline mascara with those curlers. Having read up on series 7 on the net he should know that kids who rebel against their MI5 masters end up gunned down. Rant away but listen to the liarman, Ashok. In return it'll flesh out your character, win the sympathy vote and make that final showdown a far more thrilling experience for us all.

If I live through this it's going straight on facebook

This episode felt like only half of last week's one, much less complicated without Sarah drama. Last week they broke the bar, raised one half and lowered the other. On one hand it's comforting to see our MI5 agents back to their save-the-day spy selves. It's just a shame Ros is a stranger again after reactivating her Adamantium core, nevertheless it's a sacrifice I'd endure again to give Lucas back his groove. We can't avoid her forever...or can we? Would we be satisfied if Lucas/Sarah was resolved through text messaging?

Sarah: I kill u now, take off shirt 4 1 last look
Lucas: No plz, no kill. I <3 u : (
Sarah: I <3 u 2, BFFs 4eva? : )
Lucas: K LOL XOX

(continued here with Bzirk)

How about off-screen references Maris-style?

Ros: Enjoying the party Lucas? Where's Nancy Drew tonight?
Lucas: We broke up. I thought she was the one, but a man can only take so much frostbite. *Sob*
Ros: What. A. Pity.
Lucas: She has a hidden nurturing side, sometimes she'd toss me some lotion to rub on the rope burns.
Ros: *Rolls eyes* And Harry thinks I'm the one who should see a shrink.

Or replacing her footage with something more cuddly.

Bring on the finale.

Spooks 8 - 6 Lucas/Sarah

2009-12-12T01:37:00.001+11:00

Part 2: Lucas/Sarah

(Spoilers - This is the continuation of an earlier post)

Their climactic scene in her apartment was so thrilling some of my mind blew away from the shockwave, but there was a distracting nasal voice in my head muttering "Lucas is looking more supersap than superspy". The tug of war between boo and yay was driving me bipolar, and when I get like this there's only one thing for it: a session with Nugget the shrink in my head.

How do you feel about Lucas after this episode?

I've been through a whole daisychain of reactions to Lucas. After watching the climax my broken heart jumped so high up I had to swallowed it back down again. After I took a few deep calming breaths, I then thought 'What a needy lovesick idiot'! Which became 'Maybe I'm overreacting'. After all, he's not Mr Thornton or Guy anymore, and I should stop expecting such things from Spooks. But as blown away as I was by Richard Armitage kneeling and pleading, Lucas' reactions felt a little off.

I miss her shellfish breath *Mope*

A needy lovesick idiot? What makes you think that?

He's supposed to be buffer than Bourne. His memory backs up every glance for later weaseling, and he's got that MacGuyver thing going where he can make booby traps out of any old junk. Lucas knows what her dark roots did to Walker but despite the last episode when those dooming brooders promised some serious backlash, he's done nothing about it. How can he be spooky when his human judgement is so poor? Whenever she says 'Honey' I feel like I'm being slapped in the face. Ughh, that stuff can't be unsaid. It reminds me of my friend who's dating someone so wrong for her. We have long talks where she tells me their latest disaster, but she always forgives him, makes excuses for him, and even if she's miserable she can't let go.

His face of thunder foretold a big confrontation smack down.

Didn't deliver.

Actually it reminds me of what happened when you were -

Let's stick to Lucas ok?

Alright, are Lucas and 'She' in love?

No I don't think so, but the storyline thinks they are. It started out as a sex game then somewhere along it's decided to become a tragic love story. He knows she's a murderous harpy, and he's still surprised when she pulls a gun on him. "No, not you!" he said. As if she were Darth Vadar saying "Lucas, I am..." He may wish the bug in her handbag was a figment of his rose petal dream, and that she thought Walker wanted help bungy jumping but wishing doesn't make the noodles. Then just before she was going to pull the trigger he whispers "Take me with you" as if nothing should stand in the way of their love. It felt a bit Whitney Houston.

What if he was just playing her by saying that, so she'd not kill him?

I'd love to think that, but I'm still reeling from the old Kevin Kostner imagery. After she leaves and before the team Harry sent got there, Lucas just sits there moping. At best, it's not moping but him replaying the scene over in his mind thinking 'I'm such an ass'. Either way, he didn't try to stop her getting away.

So they're not in love. Yet the scene was still heartbreaking, but you mock most of his poignant lines.

Yeah, it's totally possible! On its own it's beautiful and heart pounding; Richard does a spectacular job with what he's given. The scene just doesn't fit in with everything that led up to it, so as long as you quarantine it in your mind you can still enjoy it. I can mock HER lines too, not just his. She tells him at gunpoint "You deserve more than this, you really do". You don't say! Christmas has come early, and here's my list: A more consistently written relationship, or at least a better edited one. A better edit of her American accent or at least a more consistent one. Better wardrobe would be nice. I think he's had the same shirt on since Malcolm left. In an earlier scene she says "This is bad, Lucas!" and I burst out laughing. Now that's a line with great replay value.

Indeed! On so many levels.

I think you're overreacting. You've built up Richard Armitage to be this hunkalicious loverboy and anything less than Thorton thud just doesn't cut it. When will you just accept that Spooks is an action-packed spy thriller not a period drama?

Nugget, you're not helping! Lucas has let me down because in the earlier episodes he showed lots of promise. He was strong enough to get one over Oleg his old torturer, but with Sarah he's regressing. How many lightbulbs does it take for Lucas to see he's being screwed? In the same episode even Ros managed a deep and meaningful meanwhile he's moping around falling behind.

It's not my unrealistic expectations. Ok, I'll admit I get a LITTLE worked up about small things, but there's gotta be something wrong first before I pounce. No their affair didn't convince me but I'm such a big Richard Armitage fan that I can mentally cut out the scene in her flat and paste it into the storyboard I've made up in my mind where things work out how I'd like. Up until this episode they'd done a good job painting her as the sneaky evil we love to hate. That climax would have worked better if she hadn't been torn pink about killing him, and played it with an icy cold stranger voice instead. That would have fit in with the prior lack of relationship cred. Alternatively, they could have built her up to be more sympathetic and tragic earlier on so that we'd understand why Lucas has gone operatic about her. There's a moment in her flat where they had that chance:

Sarah: What I am doing is so far undercover I woulda killed him if he was snow white. Nobody can know what i'm doing.
Lucas: And me?
Sarah: What do you think, Honey?

She says this last line from the other side of the room. It would have been more poignant if at this point she walks over and hugs him, saying that line really tenderly like 'how could you doubt my feelings about our tragic shellfish love'. Instead, it sounds like the reply to "Should I get the low-fat cheese?"

I think your ass is spreading. Low fat it is.

But if it was anyone else playing Lucas you wouldn't have cared if the relationship was lost in space.

Yes and no. I'd still be unconvinced but I wouldn't blog about it, and my mind wouldn't have played musical chairs with all the reasons it did or didn't work. The character Lucas has a very interesting back story, so I'd find him interesting no matter who played him. This scene would have tanked in the hands of lesser actors. It's got problems, but still shocked and awed.

Maybe they'll show her redeeming qualities later?
Perhaps. There's still a chance she'll end up saving the day by sacrificing herself Connie-style, but I'd rather bomb-strapped Ros and Sarah hug for an explosive finale. In my mental storyboard, she'd whisper "Take me with you". Ros would say "Hold on tight".

Spooks 8 - 6 Ros/Baisley

2009-12-10T12:28:00.001+11:00

I loved this episode, it made me gape, exhale, wimper, and left me on a high that transcends trivialities like spoiler warnings. So consider that the warning. Oh the pathos, the purple hoody and the plastic packaging!

Ros and Baisley the grump

Doesn't the Baisley guy look like a goblin grim reaper? He has the most wild-eyed troll face. Here's a montage of his slack-jawed madness.

My first montage: Baisley's mouth

For some obscure financial reasons which I immediately forgot, Britain can't pay its debt and is at risk of chaos and anarchy come Tuesday. MI5 are trying to confiscate some illegal funds which will help the country get by, but their guy on the inside Baisley is trying to stick them for more moolah.

I love it when an episode twists around parallel plot strands, dips it in melodrama and runs for its life. Especially when the characters learn something on the way - it makes me feel more mature just by watching! Episode 6 weaves two major plot strands, each culminating in a kick-ass bittersweet moment. The Ros/Baisley one totally earned it, but the Lucas/Sarah one didn't.

Part 1: Ros/Baisley

'Pre-Richard Armitage me' used to think that passion and drama were pimped by performances alone, but then I started this blog and found out emotional scenes have to be evolved in the plot, not just dropped like a bomb from the sky. There were plenty of ingredients in the Ros/Baisley thread that helped pull off the peak of awesomeness.

Anyone finds out I lost my cool, you die

One of the difficulties of a new storyline every ep is that it sets up a revolving door of villains and victims. As the pace moves faster those one-hit-wanderers get thinner and flatter. Can anyone remember the names of the guys that got offed in ep1 to 3 or 5? By comparison Baisley is well fleshed out, part victim, part dweeb. Throughout the negotiations with MI5 he demands constant reassurance that his family is safe. Never mind the team of hitmen, he stops at a payphone to deliver a gulping breathless warning to his wife to RUN. He won't be getting any employee of the year awards, but he's no cackling extortionist. His crisis is the result of his own actions, so we get to feel torn and maybe root for him to learn the error of his ways.You can't help but feel for the guy.

I need more matches

Payoff is more satisfying when people have suffered for it, so it was with sadistic glee that I watched Ros publicly lose it. Baisley's as hard to catch as the roadrunner! In some eps things happen too conveniently or we just get told in exposition, but in this one we see Baisley's every emotion (remember the montage?) as he runs for his life, and the whole MI5 team working to save him. Every failed attempt tightens the tension and makes us more desperate. Just when Ros thinks she has him, he slips away again. AARGH!!! The cheek of that guy! Where's a stressball and leash when you need one?! It's a relief to let off steam for the audience too. When she finally catches up with Baisley again there's no way she's waiting for backup. Save or die.

Get your own Baisley

Another strength is their resentful connection. They start off full of posturing and demands with neither side willing to give a cent. Then the danger hits and the compromises begin. Ros lowers her defences to draw him in; a name for a name, a truth for a truth. Later she confesses the sins of her job "I lie a lot" and is no longer the morally superior acerbic enforcer, she is reaching out to his level.

Their connection also comes from their parallels, and the whole is more than the sum of its parts. Baisley may be indirectly responsible for the death of his beloved family but Ros actually pulled the trigger on her colleague. Harry thinks Ros' desperation to save Baisley springs from transposing Jo, but Baisley also reflects Ros' culpability. Without giving up the names she/he can't redeem her/himself. In a trembling voice she pleads with him as her last walls come down. She sits there helpless, faced with herself and her own self-blame and remorse played out in his tragedy.

With her admission of guilt, Baisley reciprocates and voices his own role in the deaths. The names he clung to so tightly are now useless and only remind him of his disastrous gamble. When he peels them off his body it's like a snake shedding an old skin. What a bittersweet moment as Ros watches him unwrap and discard those layers that brought him to ruin.

Where does she go from here? She is struggling to deal with That Shot, but her unflinching work ethic will demand it of her just as ruthlessly tomorrow. This is as close to a crisis of identity as she can get. She lives the job, but today can hardly live with herself. Hermione Norris as Ros has officially won me over. Why did she have to wait so long? We could have been such good friends.

Part 2: Lucas/Sarah....click here.

Spooks 8 - 5

2009-12-04T19:00:00.001+11:00

In last week's episode a little of Lucas' angst was resolved and I experienced a well fed glow. Thank you Richard Armitage. But I'm still holding out for dessert - Sarah Caulfield's discovery and downfall. Will Lucas stab her in a fit of sexual rage a la Guy/Marian or will it be a hair-pulling hissyfit with Ros? One can only hope and dream.

Manet from the Impressionists looking Spooky

Call me old fashioned but much of my Spooks interest comes from the longer story arcs. Partly because I don't have the smarts to follow the disaster of the week first go, and partly because guest stars are knocked down like bowling pins every episode - Oleg was the exception. My heart so wants to bleed for the victims and villains, but I see no profit in the emotional investment when I'm rushed through motives quicker than Phylly3 can say 'Glove Porn'. My brain filters out exposition as noise and goes into standby until things calm down. I think it's still on standby now.

Glove porn, Spooks and RH style

Maybe I'm in the minority who weren't stirred by this episode. I was having a bad day, and I turned it off halfway to cook lunch. These episodes are the culmination of a whole week's anticipation, and I chose to cook! Conversely my *groan*-it's-that-guy-again partner has been conquered. I'd always dreamed that RA would win him over but I always thought I'd be in that moment too instead of draining pasta.

Wake up sleepyhead

Anywho, by this episode there's enough momentum going to make Ros my second favourite character. (Sorry Ruth, it was fun the first episode but you've been dead wood since) Last week Lucas dealt with a ghost from the past, this week it's Ros' turn with a crusty old mentor. She's bottled up tighter than a rogue nuclear sub, but I believe there are cracks appearing now.

I miss Jo

Where's the evidence? At gunpoint I heard her voice waver. I know it's not much, but normal Ros could have taken him down with a fork. Normal Ros would have already cleared the table. We all know Ms Myers is the section D alpha shemale but methinks her tough inner totty is struggling to close the Baby Spook file. "Maybe I deserve it, if not for this than for other decisions where innocent people got hurt. Don't make a decision you can't live with." This sounds like guilt to me. Or am I reading too much into it?

She said she wanted 'coffee', he thought she wanted 'coffee'

As for Lucas, I breathed a sigh of relief when I saw he chose NOT to give Sarah the keys to his swanky new love nest. Remember what happened last time he did that? What's the point of total recall if you have a selective memory Lucas? True love doesn't bug your flat. Wake up and smell the Evil. Finally he admits to having ignored his Spooky sense when it comes to She of the Dark Roots. "I've run out of other explanations".

Her roots are showing her true colours

What I loved was Lucas calling Ros right after 'taking one for the country'. He and Ros mesh so well as BFFs, she's the muscle and he's the needy chin wobbler staring at himself in the dressing table mirror. They've both been tortured, both cynical of the 'system', and they both live the job. It makes sense to me, which is probably why it won't go anywhere.

Spooks 8 - 4 Yay!

2009-11-27T13:11:00.003+11:00

Happy hump episode 4. Since seeing the preview I've been chewing my nails. Will it pay off the high not-RA to RA screen-time ratio I've endured waiting for my date with Lucas' inner demons? Finally an episode which clarifies his complex backstory using the whole Richard Armitage package instead of just point-and-shoot action. Any Tom Tariq or Harry could handle that.

Blue Lucas

On the day it screened my panic escalated. What if the writers stuff it up? What if they keep clapping Lucas and his booty call together for smooches and smack-up? What if she falls in love and grows a soul! No way, I don't want guilty twinges while plotting her downfall.

I snuck a peak at an RA forum where people were posting live commentaries. The squees rang thick and fast. "It's wonderful, RA is wonderful, gush gush! Oh and by the by, Sarah Caulfield is evil." I've been very calm up to now but YES!!!! I knew it! I was madly two-fisted air punching all over the place, and why shouldn't I, I was RIGHT!

This episode is all about trust and domination. Lucas' primary Russian torture master has found his way to London, contacts his old slave and wants ...something. I'm sure it was important, but I was preoccupied with Lucas' mental journey. The first time Lucas sees his old torturer Oleg again it felt quite ritualistic, re-establishing a wary unhealthy bond; Lucas is ordered to strip and put on a boiler suit before Oleg will appear before him.

Very Francois Truffaut

Seeing Oleg again draws disturbing memories to the surface and we get glimpses of his horrific past. Let's not delve too deeply into topics of perverted intimacy or trauma-bonding from torture. It's a sickening topic that I'd rather repress than dwell on, and it seems Lucas agrees. The producers have decided that to visually enhance the connection between Lucas' past and present, he should be given gulag-star accommodation.

See the misery and exposed pipes of his Russian cell? Cut to present day and Lucas now inhabits in some kind of decrepit warehouse. The kitchen has bars like a prison. Exposed pipes and wires run all around it, and there's a miserable-looking creeping vine.

Oleg in Lucas' kitchen prison feeling right at home

His love nest has horrible exposed pipes, wires, beams. Like so many half-buried memories, sigh.

The face-off relay in his flat made my jaw drop. It's deliciously tense, dramatic and enthralling. Between Lucas and Oleg there is a fragile intimacy and wariness as Lucas struggles to calmly do his job and Oleg dances around giving tidbits of info. When Sarah Caulfield stumbles in, the scene explodes with danger and accusation. The later confrontation between Lucas and Sarah is electrifiying. When she's also shown the door that's my cue to start breathing again. Whew!

Left alone in his flat Lucas revisits a time he gave up hope and confronts the dark part of himself repressed for so long. Rather than depressing I found it bravely cathartic. It was the emotional release needed after the volatile stand-offs. What a marathon performance. This is the sequence where I was too lost in Lucas' inner life to give a damn about plot holes or corny lines.

Or Sarah Caulfield. I have to sheepishly admit now I'm warming to his booty call. She's sneaky and evil, EVIL! Boy if looks could kill, shut up and give us more death-stares. There is some interesting editing at the start where they intercut scenes of Lucas dreaming of Sarah while Oleg escapes from a detention centre. OMG, does this forshadow how Sarah and Lucas' relationship will develop? That Lucas will perpetuate the slave behaviour and always fall for cruel, manipulative women who prefer to be on top? Suddenly Lucas' strip club crawling doesn't seem so unhealthy.

Run Lucas, she's a shover

It's a good thing we've had to wait for this fire-cracker episode; if it had come earlier the rest of the series would be such a let down! I don't look forward to RA going back to being a glorified extra again like he was in ep 3. My standards have changed.

I went to a Spooks forum where I expected to find the long time Lucas-booing fans suddenly sitting up with a newly discovered urge to rewatch Lucas bits over again. I wanted to stand over their stammering wowing and gloat so hard that my head explodes all over their Hairy and Ruth-shipping faces. That'll show them what RA can do. See what happens when you let him flex his powers of brood?!

But no. As I read page after page of "Hairy and Ruth" my disbelief grew and grew. I thought RA fans were blinkered; these people are chronic!! Their minds have filtered out the best performance of the season and upped a 2 minute scene on a park bench to sum up the episode! HELLLOOOOOOOOO??? Did we not ride the same emotional rollercoaster of what's-his-name Lucas? Talk about deflating, gift horse in the bum shot and all that. Maybe he's too good for this show.

Oh well. I wonder if this is how Jonas fans felt about RA's Guylovers on Robin Hood? Is this karmic retribution for scene stealing the heck out of that one? I suppose you can't win over everyone. I now have a new sequence to add to my favourite RA scene list.

The proposal in North and South
The necklace blackmail in Robin Hood
The Lucas/Oleg/Sarah face-off in Spooks 8/4

Spooks 8 - 3

2009-11-16T21:40:00.001+11:00

Not much Lucas aka Richard Armitage in episode 3. This one has its ups and downs. Continuity problems are the worst of it, and a sad ending is a very high point. My mind is cartwheeling and skipping about with excitement after seeing the episode 4 preview so no juice left for ep3.

Silly Blog Entry Warning

This isn't really a review of ep 3 but more like a mini fanfic about what was happening while Ros was tied up with the Bendorf group in the underground bunker. Jo and Lucas were getting bored waiting for the lift...

They’d sent out tweets, poked facebook friends and caught up on their blogging.
“So…who'd you get for the Secret Santa this year?” asked Jo.
“Harry," he replied. "And you?"
“Ros. I’m getting her another stun gun. What’re you getting Harry?"
“Er…a Little Guy doll.”

“How did you get …with the horse?” She gaped her trademark deer-headlights look.

“No, just the Guy.”
“Who’s your source?”

“You know I can’t tell you that.” He really couldn't, it wasn't his proudest moment.

Jo was secretly jealous of any man-doll wearing more eyeliner than her. "If you tell me, I'll tell you what your present is," she tempted.
Lucas walked around considering it.

"OK, tell me first."
"It's clothing...a pair of pants," she admitted, but said no more. Ros would kill her if word got around.

"Ok, I'll forward you my source's email," Lucas said.

Spooks 8 - 2

2009-11-14T19:55:00.001+11:00

I promised myself I'd put some effort into reviewing Spooks 8 because Richard Armitage is in it. I've even hired a consultant to understand the linguistic and cultural differences. Ok, it's my viewing buddy from Somewhere-stan and he's doing it for fun, but it's the thought, you know.

"You don't know where's Tazbekstan?" I glared at him, "I want my money back."

I've heard of Tajikistan, Uzbekistan and Mount Kazbek but not Tazbekstan. I scratched my head and felt a little insulted. Sure the writers make up terrorist plots and the whole show is fictitious, but making up a COUNTRY takes us into LaLa land doesn't it? It tripped us up for a while until we saw how boo-hiss-bad they made the Tazbek politicians.

Villain of the week:

Rustam Urazov, an ethnic-sounding name to my buddy

Bloody bloggers, full of spoilers - like the rest of this entry!

While the plot revolves around oily politicians and England getting more gas, the best thing about it is Lucas getting more screen time. If only it wasn't spent in strip clubs (what's with that?) or with Sarah Caulfield.

When I saw what I saw I almost lost the will to blog, oh! It seemed to violate Newton's law of universal gravitation: two bodies are attracted to each other with equal and opposite force. As Lucas kissed the-coldest-lips-west-of-Siberia I cried "Noo! That's soo wrong!" I shivered with horror as he opened the door to danger and bad taste in women.

What an overreaction, even for me. What's wrong with me? So her accent's as patchy as my pre-RA Spooks viewings and her character's more of a plot device so far than a human being, but their moonlight rendezvous elicited such repulsion as if I was dared to french kiss my cousin. I rewatched it and finally had one of those wide-eyed Dr House revelations with a slack jawed close up: After watching so much past on-screen drawn-out relationship angst, I've got RA emotional baggage. I think I've launched into a new level of Richard-centric orbit.

The scene wasn't bad, it's just me watching with Thornton and Guy-tinted glasses. I subconsciously built up expectations of chemistry and tension, to see something like his previous dysfunctional tv relationships. What did I think I was watching; this is Spooks! Bombs, assassination and today's crisis drive the plot, not character development and inner conflict.

I urged myself to rewatch it with a clean slate, and even muted the sound so her accent couldn't get to me. Ok, the actress is fine, and RA's subtle facial expressions reveal as much as spoken dialogue. But it still feels like they've cut a scene between Lucas and Sarah Caulfield between their lunch with Mr Bell and The Smooch, it's so abrupt.

At the lunch: Lucas is distrustful and betrayed realising that she's been manipulating him the whole time.

The Cheshire cat playing with her mouse

Lucas is unimpressed with her malicious revenge.

Mr Bell backs up his colleague - Come on make nice Lucas, we're allies

Oh alright here's a wry sneer

She plays the game without so much as a prick of conscience. Railing against the frozen smile is futile; he needs to get her off guard.

This is their next scene.

They're standing too close. Since when did they get on sweety friendy terms? I figured something must have been edited out between that last wry smile and this one, something that would have shown Lucas shifting gears in his approach to her. Anyhow, with clean slate eyes and the sound off I realised maybe it's intentional there's no chemistry from her. Lucas is toying with her; oh beware ye victim of Lucas' charm. He's goading her on, and the first one to blink loses.

He lashes out with an abrupt kiss...and they're off

She hits back daring him to you-know-what.

Ha, she's experimenting with a hard drug.

He tries to trip her up with a question, watching for a slip-up

As she walks off he lets down his guard.

I wanted to like her character, but I can't help resenting her frigid guts at the moment. What's there to like? We don't know enough about her except that she's vindictive, arrogant and manipulative. Crossed fingers that we get something redeeming soon, otherwise Lucas is loving a cardboard cutout. There's gotta be something in her that he needs in his emotional make-up to heal past wounds or make himself more complete...Oh no! There I go again chasing my tail too early. Stop judging and just keep watching.

Spooks 8 - 1

2009-11-08T18:50:00.001+11:00

Num num! The Richard Armitage TV drought is over and we can all do a RArgentinian dream tango if we're in the UK or viewing by other means. I raise my hand with a plea of extenuating circumstances, I need my fix and I need it now.

Not having been a Spooks fan before season 7 much of the pathos is lost on me. In fact, not sure why I'm even writing an entry for it but I can't be the only Armitage junky who jumped on the Spooks spywagon for his national treasure and gratuitous chesticle shots. I wonder if time stood still for the make-up person gazing at a pliant topless Richard, and if that had anything to do with why it took hours and hours.

Harry has his own 'Look back at me' moment with Lucas

I've tried watching the first series but the look, feel and threats du jour to British safety were a little outdated. After the deep fat fryer and Matthew Macfadyen's underpants I'd seen everything series one could offer, so skipped to series 6 where the first 2 episodes were so engrossing and polished they might deserve their own blog entry. Afterwards it dragged a little between pockets of outrageous action goodness like the 'near bath experience' and the 'most disruptive plane passenger' before my DVD library loan week was up.

Here's a quick tour round the table:

Papa spook: Sir Harry, this guy got a knighthood.

Ardent spooks fans drool when his top shirt button is undone.

Scary spook: Ros the ball breaker.

Ultra aggressive and brash - in a 'put the kettle on' British way of course.

Baby spook: Jo the doe-eyed sweetie.

She's the underused bleeding heart of the team

Techno spook: Malcolm the team's talking encyclopedia

Wonder spook: Adam hogged all the good disaster plots

I can see why the Adam Carter character was so popular but suck it up, there's only space for one heartthrob on The Grid. I would have preferred to sacrifice someone else to bring Lucas on but 3 seasons is the use-by date for any active field grunt and it was Adam's ride home.

Can't objectify RA's character Lucas with a single word, but perhaps...

Suspect spook because MI5 don't know if he can be trusted.

Slutty spook because of those strip clubs. What's with that.

There's gotta be better words, help me out here?

Is Spooks 7/8 for the ardent RA fan? We're too varied for generalisations but maybe one day Nat or Mulubinba will have a poll to rate the show out of 10. I love a good action thriller, but find political thrillers brain-numbingly boring. I'm also too cynical to believe any small group of civil servants could bypass bureaucracy and save the world from danger every week, but it's-just-TV and stop-spoiling-it right? Speaking of spoilers I WILL keep the worst ones out.

Crisis of the week:

Last season Harry got himself kidnapped by the Russians, and in this first episode everyone is scurrying about trying to find him. On the way an ex-MI5 named Ruth gets involved. Even if you aren't an Armitage fan, this episode is worth watching just for her. The character has back story, tension, conflict and real vulnerability. She's suddenly my favourite female Spook character.

Villain of the week:

I LOVE this guy's bad guy face. He's got the arched eyebrows, lumpy nose, dark eyes and chiselled cheekbones to pull it off handsomely.

Interesting tidbit:

Right at the start of the episode there are 2 very slick and fast fight scenes. At first I thought Lucas was involved, but it's just someone with a similar nose and prominent profile.

Spooks is a team show but I wish they gave Lucas more screen time. Especially after seeing series 6 where Adam-boy always saves the day. Can't they give Lucas more good plots? Just cos they don't trust him having come back from a Russian gulag; he's not the first double agent. He keeps getting stuck watching naked women dance.

Speaking of stripping, his supposed love interest is introduced here: Sarah Caulfield. I have a baaaaaaaaaad feeling about her. Having her play off Lucas makes it so much more obvious she only has one facial expression. Every time she opens her mouth I cringe at the accent. Please please please get better Sarah.

Here's my episode summary:

Someone gets shot. Oh well, there's Lucas in a black jacket.

Oooer, a close-up. Get her head out of the way.

Someone's held at gunpoint. There's Lucas coming to help.

The end of an era? Oh look there's Lucas smiling.

It's not just my RAdoration distracting my attention from the plot. I have to watch each episode a few times to understand how all the events fit together, how they work out who betrayed who, who killed who, why they did it, how did they find out where everyone was hiding? It's like a 2 hour Jason Bourne AND James Bond movie crushed and chopped down into one, and a lot of the explanations are too fleeting (for me) to catch first time round. I promise to concentrate harder next episode.

Cross Stitch/Outlander

2009-10-24T12:27:00.000+11:00

Unlike Gabaldon's novels, this blog has a sexual references warning.

*********

Luckily my number of blog readers tally on one hand so there's little chance of upsetting anyone with what I'm about to say; Cross Stitch otherwise known as Outlander by Diana Gabaldon got me so angry I wanted to ram a felt tip pen up my left nostril and stir it around a little. But only after thoughts of tearing up my copy, bringing it in to work, shredding the torn fragments, taking the mess to the beach, setting fire to it in a big metal drum and dancing around the flames. There! Ha! No offence to this author's legion of fans.

Two names, same story

Before anyone starts backing away slowly, I'm not an easily offended prissy person and Gabaldon is not a bad writer. Bloody pus-filled violence and mayhem? Whatever. Sex of every mathematical combination of orifices and protrusions? Bored now. It's not even the graphic sexual violence which flipped my switch and brought out the Mr Hyde hatred.

If that's husband2 on the cover, he's a little hairy

The heroine of the story Claire is a vivacious, independent and opinionated WWII nurse holidaying in Scotland with husband1 when she accidentally travels back in time 200 years. There in the Scottish highlands she uses her modern medical knowledge to stay safely useful, goes through an arranged marriage to husband2, lots of explicitly described sex and other adventures. The faint of heart might fluster at her short memory of husband1 but time travel trumps bigamy anywhere.

This book got a 4.5 star rating from amazon.com. I felt duped. By mid point I was bored enough to stop, but I'd already taken 400 pages to get there. The dilemma was won by the lack of alternative reading material and a 3 hour commute on public transport. What the hell, reading on can't hurt, it's only a book right? I was so wrong. A few pages later I was practically hyperventilating and wanted to throw the paperback tome across the carriage. Instead I settled for crumpling up the bookmark in my tight knuckly fist and chucking a self-righteous public tanty. Grrr!

I understand it's Scotland 200 years ago. I understand that women had no rights. I accept that husbands might have beat their wives if they weren't slavishly obedient, and some of the bastards may have enjoyed doing it too. So when he half-smothers her, holds her down for a beating with a leather belt the whole night it was no shock. But then the 20th century time traveller wife began believing she deserved it the day after the bruising belting and of course...rushed into the next steamy sex scene! Did he beat the self-respect out of her too?

"Gee, that touched a nerve" you're thinking.
Touched a nerve? Damn straight it did.

Husband2 may not know better, but the protagonist should. Up until then she was a tough nut and this "My bad, I deserved it" drivel was utterly inconsistent with the past character development. I felt betrayed and manipulated, having hitched a ride on Claire's back and starting to feel comfortable slumming it vicariously through the feisty outspoken heroine. You can't say it's just a book, we read novels to get under the main character's skin, we're supposed to relate to her. Isn't she meant to learn and grow so we can experience it by proxy? This subjugation was no sweat for her but her reasons for believing she deserved it were totally unconvincing. My brain wanted to throw up what it'd taken in. She doesn't even have the temper to withhold sex or give the silent treatment. The day after the brutality husband2 gives her some sob story about how he got dealt a hard life, and she fondly tells him "I love you" unprompted for the first time. Nothing squeezes the heart like a beating with a heavy belt.

But that's not all, there's plenty of other unhealthy side dishes in this meal. Graphic sadism, masochism, rape, sexual torture come in bite-size chunks. If you're a sexual or physical abuse victim Stay Away From This Book. What boggles my mind is how popular and highly reviewed this book is. I read somewhere Claire and husband2 were destined for 'great literary couple' status like Scarlett and Rhett or Romeo and Juliet. I might have vomited a little in my mouth. Why is wifebeating husband2 so popular and swoonworthy among the fans? He was so bland that until they got married I thought he was a support character. There's too much sex and too few obstacles for any effective sexual tension or chemistry.

So... continue the novel while shoving a pencil up my nose and sticking a knife in my ear, or just stop reading? The other alternative was to persuade myself that after the beating she actually went mad so there's no rational explanation for her behaviour. But then realised I didn't care enough, and had better things to do.

BBC's Little Dorrit - 2

2009-10-16T17:12:00.001+11:00

In Little Dorrit the clownish support characters swarm in stealing many scenes, sometimes they're a little too interesting for their own good. Here are my favourites:

I love the snorting rent collector Mr Pancks. Doesn't he look like the lovechild of Jiminy Cricket and Porky Pig?

He's always speed walking those stumpy legs as he chases the tenants growling "Rent day! Rent day! ... *Snort*". Eddie Marsan the actor totally owns the role. If you've subjected yourself to 'Ultimate Force' for Richard Reasons then you may recognise him from the pilot.

Pancks moves like a character from a Charlie Chaplin movie, quick jerky expressive movements especially in the 'Tipsy Leap Frog' scene. Every character in Little Dorrit is imprisoned somehow, and Pancks is trapped in a dead-end job that scares everyone away as he wrings out every rent cent. He wishes for acceptance and friendship but receives avoidance and blame instead. When he knows his fortunes are changing, his first indulgence is buying quality food and drink for the harangued tenants. See he's not so bad.

I wished there was someone very short, bossy and wheezy for him as a romantic interest, this guy deserves a bit of snorty lovin'. Someone to enslave his desperate little heart and sand down the rough edges until it's as smooth as his bald head; give him a few mischievous Pancks juniors and take his mind off amateur sleuthing for a while.

Little Dorrit's tight little tapestry of interwoven characters and their close community really grow on you. I'm pairing off the single people in this show because in Dorrit town all the happy people are part of loving families or communities. Pancks is a pseudo-guardian of the community. The next step for him is the wife and kids! Speaking of matrimony, the other favourite character is the adorable flappy-eared John Chivery.

I challenge anyone to watch Little Dorrit and not be moved by his tearful proposal and hissy fits. Oh, he got me feeling all motherly! Poor John. "There, there young man. Nice guys don't finish last. No need to cry, in your job you'll meet plenty of other young women. Maybe prison isn't the most romantic place, but word will spread about your cute ears and boyish tears. Soon you'll be shutting yourself in the Marshalsea to get away from all the head patting cheek pinchers."

This guy's gut-wrenching earnestness is enough to restore any cynic's faith in humankind. His whole body is an open bleeding emotional wound. Imagine the intensity of Mr Thorton's proposal in North and South but minus the sexual tension, anger and self-consciousness. Replace it with pure adoration and chivalrous rejection. If only all prison officers were such diehard romantics with actor Russell Tovey's baby face.

Something else is nutty about the character of John Chivery. Most people fantasize about their future life together with their wives. Not this guy, he daydreams about tombstones and eulogies! What's with that? Something to do with working in a prison and seeing people incarcerated for life? Maybe he thinks the only escape from his prison of unrequited love is death.

Finally a special mention to Captain Slingo the shifty-eyed horse dealer. He only has one scene but he milks it for all it's worth. You'll be transfixed by his tongue!

Game of Thrones, casting

2009-10-14T23:53:00.001+11:00

Despite an exhausting day of jury duty I must gush or burst!

I just found out a pilot for 'A Game of Thrones' by George RR Martin is being made.

AAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!

*Two fisted punches in the air. Pulling of hair*

If you've read the book, check out the casting so far. Then jump, shriek, cry, laugh all at once!

Enough said

BBC's Little Dorrit - 1

2009-10-12T17:38:00.001+11:00

Some people are so good to their dysfunctional families it does my head in, like Little Amy Dorrit from a perversely enjoyable adaption of Dickens' novel recommended by RAFanBlog. It's a parable stretched into a delicious saga packed to bursting with colourful characters, vivid imagery and weighty themes. Imprisonment, money, respect, family and self-sacrifice all get their turn.

Amy Dorrit was born and raised in the Marshalsea, a debtor's prison where her father has spent over 20 years. She's a tiny young woman with the thankless role of caring for her fretful insecure father and selfish older siblings. Amy finds seamstress work with Mrs Clennam, a harsh puritanical old woman I'd call the mother of hellfire .

Mrs Clennam's middle-aged son Arthur Clennam returns, or rather escapes from the family business in China. He brings a mysterious watch given by his dying father, and his intriguing last words which imply their family has committed some wrongdoing. His mother coldly refuses to divulge anything, but the son begins to suspect his family is in some way involved in the misfortunes of the Dorrits.

So many characters - there are still some left out

Ok, boring stuff over. For those of you who have seen the show, have a go at naming all the characters in the above two images. Go on! I challenge you to do it in under 60 seconds! Then, see if you can name all the characters MISSING from the above two images. I can name 14 missing characters.

As you can see this show seethes with so many quirky characters you might struggle to remember them all. First time viewing I got impatient because I was busting to find out about the mysterious watch and didn't want the confusion of so many other plot strands. The watch even contains a bit of cloth that says "do not forget" on it, urging everyone of it's plot importance so how could I forget it? However with the second viewing you can sit back, have fun with all the amusing caricatures and trinkets and see the events unfold in light of the revelations from the final episode.

If you're like me and are too shallow to subject yourself to depressing slums, bleak childhoods and squalid poverty, never fear. Despite its serious themes and wholesome main characters Little Dorrit doesn't always take itself seriously. It's rather whimsical in its tone thanks to the writhing mess of comical and sometimes over-the-top secondary characters balancing out the gloomy London scenes. I can even imagine it being remade for kids as an animated movie series. "Each week collect one of the 37 Little Dorrit toy figures with your purchase of a Happy Meal! This week it's Mr Tite Barnacle." Yes, that's an actual name. I'd be in plastic toy heaven. Stay tuned for more. I'm doing this Dorrit style, episodic!

The Lords of the North

2009-10-04T11:04:00.013+11:00

I’m so glad to be living now instead of the 9th century, especially if it were England. I'd be totally unemployable; too soft-hearted to be a fighter, not noble-born, can’t do farming – allergies. At the first sign of Viking raiders I’d trip over fleeing, get hacked to death or sold into slavery.

An old map

I was taken there for 12 hours listening to The Lords of the North, 3rd book in the Saxon Chronicles by Bernard Cornwell. It’s available as an unabridged audiobook read by the most guilty pleasure Richard Armitage. Come on, of course that's why we're here. Who else would I skip 2 books for? Not that anyone recommends skipping. At minimum read or listen to book 2 The Pale Horseman before tackling book 3 otherwise names and events will just go over your head. You won’t realise what you’ve missed. This review contains spoilers from the 1st and 2nd book in the series. (But I don't think they're huge ones. It's LOTN that's got the big plot twists.)

Don't read the blurb on (audio)book 3. There are MASSIVE spoilers.

Sloth has been my biggest sin since discovering tv. I was a bookworm child and don’t know why I wasted effort reading when I could have just let someone else do the imagination work for me. Historical fiction is perfect for audiobook with so many different accents and characters. If you've seen Richard in Cbeebies you know he can make himself sound unrecognisable.

My partner once suggested that much of Richard’s appeal comes from his voice. “It’s very deep and soft,” he said. See? It's practically a universally acknowledged truth. Listening to LOTN felt like a personal experience, and by the end of 10 tapes it felt like I'd gotten to know him from eavesdropping on him rehearsing a play. He dramatizes more than other people do in their recordings.

The series recounts the experiences of Uhtred, a Northumbrian child raised by the Viking Danes. At the start of LOTN Uhtred is furious, vengeful and 21 years old. If only I could write Guy of Gisborne fan fictions like Uhtred’s tale. So much repressed anger and violent ambition to reclaim lost property. Both are outsiders grudgingly sworn to manipulative men they hate. It’s their differences that show Uhtred to be the better man though. He’s utterly desensitized to violence but has kept his conscience.

“All anger and threat, my grim Uhtred.”

Threats indeed. Sometimes you'll wish he’d just shut up about who he’s killed and who he wants to kill. Him and his stupid fearsome reputation. In such barbaric times massacre was an honest day’s work. In fact, I’ve made a resume for Uhtred below based on books 1 and 2. How employable would he be today? You wouldn’t want to get between him and his morning coffee.

There was an OMG moment trying to write this blog entry. Whenever I tried to think about character development my mind just went blank for ages. Then it came to me, there was none! Ok that's an exaggeration, but LOTN is a plot driven page turner, and Uhtred is hardly the sort to self-analyse or get introspective. It reads like very violent young adult fiction. I got really fond of Uhtred though. At times he's just as cruel as his enemies but it's how he treats women and children that shows his softer side.

"Your arrogance blinds folk to your kindness."

Maybe watching period drama stuff has ruined my appreciation for fast paced action blockbusters. I'm not asking Uhtred to have a cup of mead and talk about his feelings, but is it too much to ask for a little self-questioning? Of course it's out of character; he's not particularly self-aware. If he came in for an interview showing off that resume I'd sit him down and this is how it'd go:

Me: I see you have lots of marauding and pillage experience. Tell me, how do you feel the loss of your father and older brother has affected your relationship with other men in your life?
Uhtred: ...What did you say?
Me: For example King Alfred. Sometimes he's like a disapproving father figure.
Uhtred: That hypocritical pious fool. I won him back his kingdom and all he ever talks about is repenting for my sins! I'm a descendent of Odin and proud of it. Do I have the job? I killed a Lothbrok you know. It's written there under 'Kingdom of Wessex' experience.
Me: Yes, very good. It's interesting that you're so forgiving.
Uhtred: I am?
Me: I wonder if it's to do with the Danes raising you as one of their own when they should have killed you. Or from your conflict of loyalty between your rightful King and the Danes who made you the fearsome warrior you've become.
Uhtred: Stop your spells, sorceress! How do you know me so well? *Unsheaths Serpents breath from scabbard* What is it you want with me?
Me: Nothing! Just a deep-and-meaningful that's all. Here, take my silver earrings. Please don't kill me. I wouldn't look good on your resume!

The swirling external conflicts induce internal struggle in Uhtred for he has a foot in every camp, and the unification of England makes a grand sweeping backdrop to his personal journey. It would have made momentous reading if the battles won with shield walls and axes were reflected in Uhtred coming to terms with his own inner demons. Why did I have expectations of character development for a violent action packed story such as this? What made me want a deep and meaningful with the protagonist? Usually people just switch off the brain when there's going to be fights and explosions.

My theory is that Richard's dramatising has done for Uhtred what it did for Guy of Gisborne. He gives the character such a pained and angsty internal voice that you'll get lulled into believing Uhtred more emotionally complex than he really is. Maybe that's why one part of me asked the question about character development but had no answers?! Perhaps it's wishful thinking. Perhaps I'm just dense. Perhaps it'll come later in the series. If violence and historical fiction is your thing, then I recommend the whole series. If not then stick to the audiobook versions of The Pale Horseman followed by LOTN.

The Impressionists

2009-09-22T21:09:00.004+10:00

If I could go back in time and speak French to Claude Monet, I'd tell him "I love your work, and I feel your pain, man." I'd tell him about my high school art teacher who never appreciated me and always gave top marks to a hack whose father was an artist. Then I'd tell him to lose the goatee. Does he really want to be remembered by future generations with that rodent thing stuck on his chin? Richard Armitage looks better with a few days stubble and since he plays him in 'The Impressionists', he should cull that thing for the greater good.

The chin thing

I held off watching The Impressionists because of facial hair reviews like this one, but after Nat's one it got a second chance. It looks like the stuff plucked from a shower drain, but in full body shots it's easy to get distracted by the enviably long legs. The short waistcoat and hunch make them look extra spindly.

Tall Claude

The work of Monet, Renoir, Degas and Cezanne is now well loved but like most art revolutionaries their work was considered as detestable as kiddy porn in their day. In the mid 19th century the French Art Police valued only historic or religious themed grandeur; dark and gothic was very in. People didn't bat an eyelid at frolicking nude Venus, but painting outdoors with visible brushstrokes? Never. A woman painted with a direct gaze? The horror. The Impressionists didn't sell well until much later and were often in debt.

In this show Monet and his fellow rebels aim to capture some intangible 'moment' unique for each of them. They are fascinated by interplay of light, colour and movement. Monet sprints after it, dragging Renoir and Bazille along. Degas hides from it but it haunts him nevertheless, while Manet pretends he doesn't care. Cezanne wrestles with his distrust of it all, his inner demons push him to realise perfection of composition by recognising tricks played by the eye. He steers past colour to contemplation of basic shape and human perception.

Cezanne in Province

The Impressionists is also about acceptance by your peers and the general public. Yeah, who needs it!...even me. I had no clue until starting to write stuff and thus becoming a neurotic comment junky overnight. If there were no comments, why didn't anyone like me? Why does my work stink? I hated that my self-worth was directly proportional to how popular my stuff was. It wasn't even my day job; how much worse if it was my bread and butter? Or for the Impressionists, their beans, bread and cheese? No wonder artists are such an odd bunch.

Occasionally Monet's support group felt like a Seinfeld clique - a bunch of misfit personalities frequenting the same cafe to gripe about art critics, the establishment, money, parents, wives etc. Monet is Jerry, the cheerful guy who is the glue of the group. Renoir is Elaine, his pseudo partner with some claim to common sense. Degas is a mixture of George and Newman, a self-serving weirdo railing against society, and Cezanne is Kramer the wild-eyed and canvas-hurling eccentric.

Degas: Who moved my cheese?

Just as you would expect in a show about art, the lighting, imagery and costumes demonstrate the artists' awareness of shifting brightness and shadow. The light beams in each scene flicker temptingly, beckoning come hither. See the way it dapples the faces and figures of brightly-dressed Monet and his friends in the two images below? Whenever they're indoors, rays of light filter through from a window or some strange sunroof creating interesting shadows as the artists move about. It's very arty. Monet dresses arty too. His neckties, vests are almost cartoony bright; his coat is always a lighter shade than others for he basks closest to the brilliance.

Renoir and Basille watch Monet out the window

Basille and Monet, regulars at Cafe Guerbois

Apart from the picturesque and dazzling outdoor shots, my favourite scene is right at the start with Monet sneakily sketching the other train passenger. That little smile, those furtive glances out the corner of his eye. The other guy can tell something's going on but is too polite to say anything! So sweet. We had to do the same in art class on our yearly pilgrimage to the state art gallery.

More cravats and train stations (no Miss Hale though)

If you're familiar with Impressionism then you'll squeal in delight whenever the scenery morphs into the infamous painting inspired by it. Seeing these beautiful creations placed in historical, geographical and emotional context for each painter is a moving and fascinating art lesson, and ultimately this is how I saw The Impressionists. Unlike in high school, now I'll never forget Manet's Olympia, Degas' brothels and ballerinas, Monet's Woman in the Green Dress, or Bazille painting his beloved recovering from a discus hit on the leg. I'm even growing fond of haystacks and apples.

Ultimately there is more information than drama, for the drama kept getting interrupted and lost some momentum in the second half. You might tune out every time the interviewer guy comes on screen; he's just a device to disguise leaps in time and narrative. You might feel unfulfilled by the big gaps later in their lives as they reach artistic maturity, particularly because you've just gotten to know and care about them. I googled their surnames to fill in the blanks and find out whether some of them were as unhygienic, charming or misogynistic as they were portrayed, and will visit the library to read up more.

It feels almost like researching a friend's family tree. My high school art teacher would have been proud of me, though he'd still give full marks to that hack whose father was an artist. That fool. I could've been a Monet! Nevertheless, it's time to try out some of the art filters on my image editing software and go on a gallery crawl this weekend. See how well this docudrama has brought history alive? I'm inspired.

The Protector

2009-09-13T14:26:00.104+10:00

Which is more torturous, the totally bad one or the bad one with 1 good thing?

I'd pick the bad one with 1 good thing, especially if that 1 good thing is really really good. It's a tempting bit of pleasure mixed up with so much pain. Like Robin Hood series 3, high school reunions or The Protector. I doubt anyone who's bothered to read my blog has heard of this movie since most of my entries so far have 'BBC' in it. The Protector is an Ass-Kicking martial arts movie I watched as a family bonding experience with my parents. For 1 hour 15 minutes I tossed and turned considering if it was worth rubbishing decades of filial piety by walking away from this. I'd never hear the end of it. Even on her deathbed my mother would bring it up as a reason why she died before her time, that I had killed her, that I never loved her...so I stayed put.

The best way to understand the Protector is not to think of it as watching a movie, but rather a computer game where the hero has to fight his way through all different levels leaving no ass unkicked. Ultimately the goal is to save his brothers who happen to be delightful elephants.

Like the romance genre, the martial arts genre has its Meet-Cutes, its archtypes and the Happily-Ever-After. However, the Meet-Cute is replaced by the Meet-Fight. The love scenes are blood scenes, and the Relationship Crisis and Happily-Ever-After are replaced by the Near-Death Crisis and Bittersweet Triumph. The archtypes in martial arts movies are meant to showcase all the different skull crushing styles. They demonstrate the variety and scope of the protagonist's combat skills, like the heroine's gaggle of quirky friends/family in the romance genre.

There are some really enjoyable formulaic action movies, and plenty of well-written martial arts movies. If you're a fan of those, then move right along. The Protector has the most blatantly paper-mached plot I've watched in a long time; what a stinker! It appears they've strung together fight scenes first, then added one or two scenes in between to herd the characters along from start to finish. Either that or they've utterly butchered the original movie down to a much smaller size. The short running time makes me quite suspicious of the latter theory. I'll never know, because there's no way I'm sitting through any other international versions (titled Tom Yum Goong/Warrior King/Revenge of the Warrior) to revisit it! It's confusing and excruciating to watch, especially with elderly parents:

"What's going on?"
"He's fighting again, but with a different guy, in a different place."
"Where did the elephant go?"
"No idea."

Many things puzzled me during this movie.

Bad guys are sprinkled randomly with no relation to elephant-stealing. Who is this weirdo with the back problem?

Where did our poor villager get the money for a ticket to Sydney to meet Jackie Chan?

When did Abalone Soup become Selection Criteria for Bodygard jobs?

Gratuitous lightbulb violence at Darling Harbour. Why?

Not light sabres. Pulling a mysterious cord summoned rollerbladers and BMX bikers who wreak gratuitous light bulb violence! What genius thought brittle glass makes good weapons?

Why does the hero dream in chocolate mousse?

Why did this temple get burnt down? What did the capoeira fighter that came next have to do with the elephants? Not that I'm complaining. It looked poetic.

In the first 30 minutes we endure about 10 confusing but beautiful fight scenes with no plot build up in both Thailand and Sydney. It felt like more than an hour. In fact the whole movie feels really long for its quite short running time. I lost count how many fights there were.

The fights really kick ass. The DVD cover tells me there were no stunt doubles, wires or CGI used in the fights, and it shows. It reminds me of early Jackie Chan movies without the ad-hoc weaponry or sense of humour and cheekiness. Or early Jet Li movies minus the attitude. The underdog of the kung fu world Tony Jaa has more genuine spirituality and self-sacrifice. He leaps and parries, weaves and throttles through these fights as if he's got his own internal energy and earnesty generator. Must be all that meditation.

Five spiral storeys of mayhem

There's a fight scene that has to be seen to be believed. Our hero enters a 5 storey building with a single winding staircase, and makes his way from the ground floor to the very top leaving no tub unthumped. I think about 40 guys and 1 kinky shrieking girl lay incapacitated at the end. IT'S ALL DONE WITHOUT A SINGLE CUT. Forget the beach scene in Atonement. In fact forget any fight you've ever watched before. This scene requires co-ordination, planning and safety on a level I've never seen outside of the boring 'Russian Ark'. Thailand should give the lead actor AND the camera guy that followed him a medal for every take they did. The closest role comparison is the Make'em Laugh song and dance from Singin' in the Rain, but that is a 100m dash compared to this cross-country agony.

Don't look down

This movie showcases one more innovation: The Behind-The-Scenes fight. Action scenes are so much work that up to now they've always been in centre focus with lots of cuts to show every single kick, punch, thrust and block. In The Protector the hero weaves around combatting baddies, but the camera guy doesn't always follow where he goes. Sometimes he moves behind a screen or into another room, and we're left to peer through woven cane or glimpse flailing limbs through a small window. I choose to see it as the martial arts representation of internalised conflict. It's fantastic for cranking up the dramatic tension because you can't follow every move that's happening. Less has turned out being more. Superb!

Nevertheless, it's pointless having good action scenes floating aimlessly when you're trying to bridge a story arc. The movie could have been much better with a little more rewriting or less brutal editing. It was so unworthy of the beautifully creative 5 storey fight scene. It was so unworthy of the love and grit infused into every move by the dynamo Tony Jaa. He brings such energy, earnesty and grace that it's heartbreaking to see it bandied around in this...this thing! I've seen other movies where he's showcased much more effectively, like Ong Bak. Stay away unless you live and breath martial arts. Otherwise just watch the fight scenes and fast forward the rest.

Keane the movie

2009-09-09T09:11:00.260+10:00

William Keane portrayed by Damian Lewis

People watch movies for all kinds of strange reasons. I watched Keane because I'm fascinated by red hair the colour of blood-oranges, Real or L'Oreal. Obviously I came into this unprepared, and for not paying attention I tripped and fell harder for it. Is there such a thing as too much suspense, too much dread in a movie? This low budget indie started like a drama, ended like a psychological thriller, and stayed with me for more than a week afterwards. How did it do that, and what am I to do now?

Can you make a character too sympathetic? Put them through your worst personal nightmare and watch them try to pick up the pieces. That's a good start. The movie is a portrait of mental torment and desperation. William Keane is trying to locate his young daughter after she was snatched from a bus terminal the day after 9/11 during a brief moment of distraction. His journey is hampered by isolation, debilitating guilt and a damaged mind.

William at the bus terminal

Keane shows, but doesn't tell. What we know for sure is this: During intermittent clear periods William makes himself presentable, tries to find work and pays his bill at a dodgy motel using government disability cheques. He speaks to himself as he struggles to appear normal but the heartsick anxiety and paranoia can't be suppressed for long. He goads and yells at himself to get up, move and go on when his courage fails him. How can he see past himself when the inner conflict absorbs so much of his attention?

At times I wondered if this was really a horror movie in disguise. The shaking dread begins when we are forced to watch him befriend a mother and her little daughter Keira staying at that same motel. The suspense was so excruciating it felt like I held my breath for the last 30 minutes. A friend I watched it with actually got up and left the room for a while saying she could not bear the tension. Two friends I lent it to found it too traumatic, and turned it off after 50 minutes.

Looks just like a regular guy

The movie uses our sympathy for William against us to raise the stakes and foreboding. The little girl's presence provides a painful illumination of the man he was and the life he had. There is a natural ease and loving yet firm manner he has with her that parents will recognise in an experienced parent. After such loss and self-blame, we appreciate what it must mean to him to feel like a father figure again to the neglected little girl. There is so much riding on this opportunity but how long can his fractured mind hold together? His undisclosed mental illness elicits unnerving and wild speculation for this is still a poorly understood illness and taboo topic.

In the usual thriller the victims experience fear, suspicion and helplessness when they realise the danger they have encountered. At the start William is a danger mostly to himself, but as soon as he meets the mother and daughter all fear, suspicion and helplessness is left shouldered by the viewer; we're the only ones who know him well. When the mother places him in a position of authority and trust I wanted to scream a warning as you would hear in a gory horror flick "The axe-murderer is right behind you, no don't go down that dark alleyway alone!" But these weren't the right words. He sees the opportunity for self-reparation as clearly as we see the potential tragedy. William as both victim and threat seen uniquely by the audience grips us in a dilemma of responsibility, and we are hooked right up to the very last second.

Abigail Breslin as Keira

This movie haunted me for over a week. From friends' comments and my reaction I've surmised this movie will bowl you over if you have experienced at least 2 of the below.

Emotional trauma
Abrupt disappearance or loss of a loved one
Parenthood
Been a counsellor or therapist

Otherwise you have 50% chance of finding it slow to start and weird. Pretty precise percentage huh.

If you have sparse awareness of mental illness then this movie will put a face to it; William is the kind of person you usually give a wide berth, not stay perched over their shoulder. You'll see the ups and downs, the unpredictability and volatility, but also the struggle, humility and bravery of a person who must face big obstacles and fears just to have a normal life.

It was hard to shake off Keane. You might find yourself briefly wanting to champion forward and 'do something about mental illness and homelessness' like I did initially! Talk about a kneejerk reaction, but I couldn't just do nothing. Maybe I'd missed the point. Why did the writer/director make this movie and what were they hoping to achieve? If part of their aim was to spread awareness and understanding then BINGO from me.

I saw Keane several months ago but didn't intend to review it, it's heavy stuff. This entry was started because last week I saw an old busker dirty and ragged at the train station looking bewildered. Swallowing my anxiety and shyness I asked how he was doing, and if he needed any help. He looked at me mumbling softly, pointed to one platform then another. When asked "Do you know where you're going?" he muttered inaudibly but seemed to be ok now, strangely. Maybe he slept on a cold pavement somewhere, maybe he knew of a shelter. I thought about Keane again and realised I can't look at the homeless or the drug/alcohol addled vagrant the same way anymore.

The BBC's Robin Hood

2009-08-23T00:11:00.435+10:00

Warning! Here there be spoilers!

I wish I knew someone over 13 who willingly watched the BBC's Robin Hood but not just to perve at Richard Armitage. Come on there's got to be someone! I'm busting to discuss it with an impartial audience. My Armitage Era began after the series ended so I've been on a Robin Hood DVD rampage.

Watch me brood

This tale needs no introduction being one of those enduring family favourites. Adventure, romance, colouring-in books and action figures. The Armitage gazer in me can't stop watching fanvids of Guy of Gisborne, the role Richard plays dressed like an 1980s rock god, but the other part of me is crying out at the injustice of it all. Help! Robin's been robbed. Someone's stolen his credibility and screen presence.

It's driven me to do a little research. I kept thinking "Why is Robin such a bore? He's a watery soup nobody ordered." It's not the fault of the actor. Everyone in this production does great with what they're given. So what went wrong? I've concluded that he's a 10 year old's action hero, and he breaks all the rules for A Sympathetic Hero.
The first inklings I had were from realising that 2D cartoon Robin had more depth. I loved it as a kid, and it kept my cousins quiet too. This is the one where all the characters were drawn as animals so Robin and Marian were foxes and Prince John was a lion. I don't like this golden memory tarnished! When you find yourself hoping Disney fox Robin saves the day, but wish that BBC human Robin had never returned from the Crusades, it's time for a rethink.

Instant tantrum cure

Robin's archery skill irks me. I know, I know, it's supposed to be his drawcard, but they use it as a get-out-of-jail-free card. It's too easy for him to get out of any sticky situations. He never hurts. He's as static and simple as a plastic superhero. So Guy has to fight like a drunkard otherwise Robin et al wouldn't get away from every scrape. The heavily guarded castle is their playground. There's always a conveniently located loo or garbage chute they can use. Guards tumble as if they're just semi-animated toy props. It's worst when Robin gets near the Sheriff. This should SO never happen. His only defence are his one-liners, and yet Robin can't kill him. Why? "I've lost my taste for killing". Oh please. At least get some leverage on the guy, not just strut and leave. Later this pathetic excuse grated so much they changed it to "Prince John will raze Nottingham if we kill him".

Let out your pain, man

Robin also needs inner struggle to appear more fleshed out, but he's so idealistic that nothing peeks through. "King and country! Sheriff's corrupt? I'll oppose him from the forest! Away from Marian? So be it!" No tension, no journey. All his choices come too easily, and he becomes a plot device rather than the eponymous hero we want to be or to have. The pilot was great because he battled on, misunderstood by everyone. Coming back from war he sees everything's gone belly-up, yet he's the only noble willing to challenge authority or speak for the people. Everyone else just tells him to shut up and cover his eyes. Nobody but his servant backs him. It's all very Hero, but after that, someone steals his mojo.

Gee, Brain, what are we going to do tonight?
The same thing we do every night, Pinky - try to take over the world!

The Sheriff and Guy may be dastardly, but they're so proactive. They see where they want to be in 2, 5 and 10 years time. Even if they get trounced worse than Pinky and the Brain at least they got off their asses and did something. Initially Robin's all puffed up with "the Sheriff must be stopped!" but he never picks to bat first. After getting outlawed all he ever does is stumble on the evil plots accidentally, shoot some arrows and pinch money. This "oh no what's the Sheriff done this time" mentality means he doesn't drive the narrative, and this buries his Hero status.
Even towards Marian, Robin never does much except play peeping tom. He left her behind on his 3 year Crusade for 15 minutes of glory, so at the start of the series we're already biased against him. It doesn't help that he laughs at her clandestine efforts to feed the starving of Nottingham. "Now I'm here, you're safe to go back to your embroidery." What's his solution to their relationship problems? "Run away with me to the insect-infested forest milady, and if you're lucky, not get rained on". As if! Not to mention he's as faithful as an escort. He'll snog anything in a skirt, and yet we're supposed to believe Marian's his one true love? Please.

Marian wished Robin wasn't watching at the window

What else kills Robin's credibility as the romantic hero? Guy. Sounds blasphemous to say, but it's a major mistep to give him more than a few seconds screen time. He's way too good at stealing...sympathy. When he's around, Robin's feelings for Marian seem like casual whimsy. The writers made Guy a tortured, yearning, conflicted villain. The costume department gave him black leather lace-up pants and metal buckled leather jacket. Armitage gave him smouldering screen presence and towering height. They should never let him too close to Marian. It gives the writers another reason to show him semi-naked, killing Robin's hopes for love-interest plausibility. With Marian in the castle, Guy has power, purpose, opportunity and angst. He may be a snake, but he's a romantic redemption-seeking reptile! He tries to win her by protecting her from the Sheriff, giving gorgeous gifts, admitting his ambitions to restore his family's former glory and dropping hints about how he'd be such a good husband. At the first sign of weakness, he pounces in proposing. Robin has no chance.

The Guy that launched 1000 shippers

It stunned, shocked and angered lots of fans - not that I condone it - but ... I can see why the writers did 'you-know-what' to Marian. Guy/Marian was overwhelming Robin's ability to Hero. He was getting totally pathetic, and not in a good sympathetic underdog way. As much as I love my Guy, this confuses the focus of the show. Don't spear me. Robin, a centuries old legend of rebellion for the helpless masses had lost his credibility. Something had to give.

Luckily the writers kick-started series three with a Robin full of self-doubt, anger and disappointment. He'd lost the trust of the villagers and had to reprove himself. Guy couldn't steal his thunder anymore. Robin was damaged goods, struggling to do the things he once took for granted. Yeah baby! The plots and scheming got a bit contrived sometimes, but nothing new there. At least Robin was doing the Hero thing and moving the show forward. This started to sour toward the middle, and I lay blame on this character:
Kate wins my award for 'Most Hated Love Interest in a TV series or Drama'. Every time she got into danger I found myself fantasizing how she was getting written out. Whenever she caught a cold or ran in a long skirt I muttered "Die, die, die..." How can you back a Hero who falls so quickly for such a shrill melodramatic childish freak? She grates on the nerves like a biting yapping jumping chihuahua. The writers cataclysmically ripped the show apart to restore Robin some sympathy, drive and chance for change. And THIS is what he does with it? Even Much and Allan fall for her too. In what universe is this believable? Not even this one. Please let there be fan fictions out there where she meets a long-awaited end.

Robin loves my pottery and bad temper

What's wrong with her? She has all the maturity of a tantrum-throwing brat with only two catchphrases. The first one is "You fancy her don't you?" even mid-battle. Wrong priorities. My goodness, there are bigger things at stake than whether Robin has kissed her today. How does she think Much and Allan feel about her lusting after Robin in front of them? Grow up.
The other catchphrase is, "He killed my brother!" Their situation sometimes calls for co-operation with enemies against a common threat. Yes he killed your brother, but in the gang everyone has suffered worse, join the queue kid. She herself betrayed Robin before, yet expects special treatment. The gang have been through more than two tv series. This substitutes well enough for character development, but the fact they think highly of her undermines that.
At one point Little John remarks to Robin how how 'special' she is! Compared to whom? Brave Djak who knew medicine, biology, chemistry, physics, Saracen weaponry and language? Or freedom-loving Marian who was their eyes and ears in the castle and among all the nobles, had Guy dying to please her, and the admiration and love of the villagers? I'm not sure which is worse: a weak-willed Robin with no power to bring change, or a Robin who throws all his blood-spilt Hero's Sympathy away for a childish brat.
Tracking Robin and Guy's push-pull for chest-beating and romantic dominance has shown me what can build or kill a protagonist. It takes light and several grades of shade for a plausible hero. I'm sure there are people who disagree with my opinions in this blog entry, but that's the cool thing about having a mixed bag of characters. You can pick and choose the flavours you like.

So again...anyone over 13 who saw Robin Hood but not just to perve at Richard Armitage?

Richard Armitage

2009-08-11T11:39:00.039+10:00

I wrote a sane review of North and South a few weeks back, and now it's time for the ugly truth. Or rather, the gorgeous smouldering truth. That's right I'm talking about you, Richard Armitage! I used to be a normal person, occasionally catching a movie or dvd, my verdict limited to "Yeah, it's ok" or "Nah it's crap". Thanks to you that's all changed. Because of North & South, I'm doomed to watch and rewatch anything where you so much as sneeze or pluck lint off your clothes. Even when you're a bad guy, I'm willing to overlook the cruelty, manslaughter and lies, cos you look hot in leather!

Look what you made me do

And that's not the worst of it. You're like one of those spammy chain emails threatening 5 years bad luck unless forwarded to 10 people in my address book. I've rewatched North & South with my friends and family, desperate to not be alone in my madness. I sit struggling to appearing sane before non-converts. "I swear, it's a serious drama. Conflict and rebellion during the industrial revolution. Such interesting use of colour!" Not drowning in drool or gurgling if I talk whenever you're on screen is harder than it looks. Ughh, I'm recruiting for you! It's like some oestrogen-fueled pyramid scheme with no payoff. Your shows should come with a disclaimer, "The commentaries and man-beauty expressed here are not endorsed by yada yada..."

Stop it!

I've even joined an online forum where similarly hypnotized women analyse and read into every single muscle twitch, eyelid flutter and voice intonation you ever did. I suspect they're always on Armitage alert on the streets of London. If you so much as pick your nose, I'll know. Thanks to the internet, I've seen everything you've been in, done voice work for, and every single happysnap ever taken of you. That includes the bedtime stories you read wearing tight shirts and jeans. That sounded dirty didn't it! But it's your fault! My partner is creeped out by it all. But he puts up with it, John-Standring-your-character-from-Sparkhouse style. It'll pass, he thinks.

Please, no more.

Luckily, my computer skills don't go quite so far to making fan videos. I just drool over other people's talented compilations of your strutting and scowling. Usually to the tunes of whoever is the most marketable teen idol of the hour. See what I've been reduced to? This is the love that dares not maximise the window to full screen just in case someone comes in and sees it. I'll admit it. Maybe confession will lessen my obsession. The other day watching snippets of you from a Brit serial, I found myself yelling at the computer screen, "Get away from him, he's mine!" or "You gotta earn him! You're not worthy!"

That's right. You heard me.

I want to wring you out from my system like dishwater from a smelly sponge. I rue the day I borrowed N&S from my local library. It's a downward spiral, and who knows when it'll end? When I get your Guy of Gisborne action figure? Plus sword and fully-articulated-horse-with-realistic-galloping-action? Don't laugh. You'll be sorry. Right now I'm at an unfamiliar level of Unattainable-Celebrity-Crushitis: I've started writing fan fiction. I know, I'm a lost cause. When the leading male is not you, but some whiny, peach-faced, i-got-picked-last-in-sport runt who can't brood to save his life, and you don't get the girl, I'm. Not. Happy. I'm rewriting that ending, and you will get what you deserve.

Oh, get a room.

Image sources: piecesofalice and artic-fox

The BBC's North and South

2009-08-02T17:20:00.041+10:00

North and South is a Victorian drama based on a novel by Elizabeth Gaskell. It is often described as "like Pride and Prejudice", though it is far from witty light-hearted comedy. More like a love story with death, illness, poverty and violent riots.

Margaret Hale

It is about a young lady named Margaret Hale who moves with her family from the south of England to the smoky industrial city of Milton in the north. She finds herself caught up in the clash between workers striking and factory owners who struggle with market volatility and cheap imports. Margaret meets a cotton mill owner John Thornton who has wrenched his family out of debt by self-restraint and determination. On the other side of the conflict she meets Nicholas Higgins, a union man advocating better worker wages for all of Milton.

Riot at a mill

At the start Margaret has a somewhat naive and idealistic view of life. She hates the dirty smoky city of Milton. Its inhabitants seem in a constant state of labour and commercial gain at the expense of others. As a parson's daughter, she is part of the upper class, with all its disdain of those in the manufacturing or 'shoppy' industry. However, as she gets to know her new-found friends in Milton, she sees past the sharp and bleak exteriors and admires their strength of character.

Although Thornton and Higgins both grow and learn as the story progresses, it is Margaret who goes through the greatest personal transformation. She is well educated with cultivated manners and airs, but this has also made her proud and and quick to judge. She's had a sheltered life having a country clergyman for a father, and time spent with her fussy socialite aunts. Her youth and inexperience contribute to the huge culture shock when she moves to the north. It is her tenacity and sense of responsibility which facilitate the open-mindedness and compassion she develops living in Milton.

Margaret addresses an angry mob

The main theme explored in the series is the breakdown of barriers. There are communication barriers between the Hales, class barriers between all main characters, plus social barriers between the mill owners and their workers. In each case the barriers have been built so high that the only two ways they are lowered are:

1. An independant outsider hears both sides of the story. Through their common friendship with the outsider, both sides are brought into closer contact and gain glimpses of what lies over the barrier. With a wider view, more dialogue and understanding, the walls dissolve.
2. A tragedy occurs which forces one side or both to relent from their position. When this happens it is shocking, abrupt, with mixed results and harsh side-effects.

Nicholas Higgins at a union meeting

Margaret's opinions of Milton and south are emphasised visually through colour and tone. Scenes in the bucolic south or opulent london houses are richly saturated with colour, brightly lit and have a soft focus. Like rose-tinted memories of better days. Scenes in the industrial north are shown in contrasting and sombre tones of black, grey and white. Those who enjoy watching period pieces for beautiful costumes and lavish ballroom scenes will not have much eye candy here.

The South

The North

Do not fret. There is something better: the interior of working cotton mills! This is a visual treat especially for those with an interest in mechanical tools. The workers toil at their wrought metal machinery which precisely guides the cotton threads. These images set this series apart from the usual costume drama with stately houses and manicured lawns. In one key scene, we watch the ethereal cotton float dreamily in the air. Suddenly a dark silhouette comes into focus. As it cuts across the mill we realise it is the menacing figure of the mill owner John Thornton. In North and South appearances are deceiving. The cotton appears soft and beautiful, yet it slowly clogs and chokes the workers lungs. Thornton appears cruel, bad tempered and violent as the master of the mill, yet he is a complex character that has inspired plenty of discussion.

Margaret's first view of a cotton mill

It is impossible to review North and South without elaborating upon the phenomenon that is Richard Armitage as John Thornton. This is a juggernaut of a performance. If there is ever another adaption of this novel, I pity the actor who has to fill Armitage's shoes. Hopefully it won't be for another 20 years, because it would take a generation gap for viewers to forget this actor's turn. The man was born to play Thornton. Tall, dark, deep set eyes, hawkish nose and strong jaw all give him an air of will power and rough masculinity. This guy could outbrood any Byronic hero even with a mustard coloured cravat.

Mr Thornton

It is not simply the physical appearance of Richard Armitage which has elicited so much admiration of John Thornton, though it certainly doesn't hurt. During Victorian times, Margaret would have been considered out of Thornton's league, despite his wealth and position in Milton society. This is since he is from the manufacturing industry, and she is a lady belonging to a higher class. It makes him the underdog. His violent tendancies, steely business principles and sharp facial features make him appear somewhat dangerous.

Thornton's machinery is an extended analogy of the man himself. Forged and toughened metal which delicately weaves thread into quality fabric. He built up his cotton empire despite having started out with a terrible inheritance of debt and family shame. Upon reaching an admirable position in Milton society and business, he seeks to improve his general education through tutoring and open discussion with Mr Hale. This shows an inquisitive and clever mind open to new ideas.

In his relationship with his mother, Thornton also stands out. She is iron-willed and frightfully proud. She does not tolerate fools or any criticism of her son. Thornton appreciates her contribution to the man he has become. They are both honest and open with each other, having lived years of hardship interdependantly. He respects her, but ultimately always makes his own decisions and takes responsibility for his own actions. Especially if they affect his workers. What a son!

Mrs Thornton

These are the major factors which endear the character to the viewer. We see him make decisions with far-reaching consequences, sometimes blunders, learning and eager to try different approaches. Watching him struggle, most people are on the edge of their seats hoping that he will not lose what he has toiled for.

When the series first screened end 2004, the viewers clogged up the BBC messageboard so heavily they crashed it. The BBC decided to shut it down but the series had already worked its magic. The fans were bewildered when informed there were no plans for a DVD release. Had it not been for the articulate and persistent campaigning of the 'Armitage Army', those without BBC on cable would have little chance to watch this rare example of tv enchantment. The excellent script, cast and still relevant themes have brought together like-minded individuals with a fondness for English literature and intelligent tv adaptions. Finally the DVD was released. Friendships have formed. Some have followed the cotton trail online and made fanvids and banners inspired by the series. Others have gone on to pursue careers as writers! It's pretty encouraging to discover what good storytelling can inspire.

I just think it's cool to watch a leading man from the manufacturing industry (for once!!) and see inside a cotton mill. Highly recommended.

Resource link

The Forsyte Saga

2009-06-21T08:49:00.033+10:00

The version of the Forsyte Saga mentioned here is the 2002-2003 TV mini-series with Damian Lewis and Gina McKee. Yes the one in colour.

The Forsyte Saga is a sprawling storyline about a well-to-do family in Victorian England. Most of the story explores the unhappy marriage between Soames and his wife Irene (pronounced Ireny), and the consequences of Irene's affair with Phillip Bossinney. Phillip himself is engaged to another Forsyte family member. After being introduced as a talented architect, he is commissioned by Soames to build a country house for he and Irene away from London and the rest of the Forsyte clan.

The Saga is a sumptuous period piece about love, obsession and letting go. However, at face value it all sounds like a daytime soap, and some of the plot twists are fairly farfetched. The first 20 minutes require some concentration. There are so many similarly dressed characters introduced quickly, and starts with a scandal which felt flat because there was not yet any emotion invested in these characters.

Jolyon Forsyte is a cousin to Soames, and their two branches of the family tree don't get along. Jolyon ups and leaves his wife and young child to live with the nanny. What a cliche! We don't know much about the bohemian artist Jolyon yet. Due to this, it is difficult to feel interested or convinced in the abrupt way the separation occurs. It is only when Soames meets his future wire Irene and begins his sweetly awkward courtship that the series engages, and the inevitable comparison to Jolyon's separation lurks in the background.

The Forsyte clan all carry the 'possessive and materialistic' gene. Soames in particular is proud, narrow-minded, authoritative and driven. In the course of the drama, we also see the emotional inheritance of being a 'Forsyte'. They love wildly and passionately, a manic limerance or obsession which is at odds to the financial-transaction-style marriages they pragmatically endorse. When a Forsyte falls in love, they want to mean everything to and do everything for their victim. This need to be needed often draws them to penniless talent, charm and beauty; there is a higher chance of meaning more to their object of affection. Soames and four other Forsytes suffer love in this style, with varying levels of return.

Above: Soames and Irene after their first dance together.

Soames is the culmination of all that the Forsytes pride in property, and suffer in possessiveness. This character is one of the most interesting villains I've ever watched, and Damian Lewis as Soames does a wonderful job of portraying the range of emotions the character suffers in his failed marriage. He is a rigid complex of so much emotional ignorance and ever-persevering passion. It is difficult to condemn him as a simple villain and brute. We see so much bewilderment, vulnerability, persistent and poorly expressed love that it is hard not to sympathise with him most of the time. Mostly I wished to grab him by the shoulders, shake him and advise "Let it go! Learn from it and move on!"

Soames' pitiful victim of obsession and circumstance is Irene. She is forced to marry Soames although she does not love him, otherwise she will be cast out by her step-mother after her father's death. Since marriages of convenience are the trend rather than exception, she gambles her future on love and acceptance developing later in the marriage. She also makes Soames promise to let her go free if the marriage is not a success. Unfortunately the gamble does not pay off, and a few years later her dislike of Soames has grown to the point where her marriage is a leash, and Soames is unconsciously choking her spirit. To compensate for the forced physical closeness of living under the same roof, she is emotionally distant, unresponsive and cold to him. Such is her revulsion she takes steps secretly to prevent having children. Gina McKee as Irene portrays 'guarded and aloof' very well. Unfortunately Irene and the architect's long lingering looks in church did not convince me of their great love, and there is much more chemistry between the architect and his fiance June, Soames' cousin-once-removed.

In this tale of marital strife, family feuds and torrid affairs, there is no easy ending with unconvincing altruism or sacrifice. Soames' relationship with Irene is compared and contrasted to those of other Forsytes, especially Jolyon, Winifred and June. We watch the characters suffer the consequences of their actions. To what extent they learn from their mistakes and overcome their hereditary and individual character traits is for the viewer to discover and enjoy. Highly recommended.